Expanding Family

April 3, 2024 / fgrtommo / Leave a comment

Easter is a time when we tend to think of the emergence of the new. For the religious Christians, there is Jesus’s resurrection, for me there is the coming of Spring blossom and warmer weather, and for children there are Easter eggs.

This year, for Jane and I, there was the magic of a new life: a Second Grandchild (SG). What a marvellous thing!

SG’s mother and father (Middle Son) are absolutely besotted with the new arrival and seem to be coping very well. SG himself has seemed very chilled during the two visits that we have made so far to his Bristol home. He seems so much smaller and longer legged in comparison to First Grandchild (FG) at the same age. But maybe that is my faulty memory; all babies seem impossibly vulnerable, tiny and yet so full of potential.

*^{Second Grandchild In His Easter Chick Suit}*

SG’s arrival has been a great excuse to drag out old photo albums to look for similarities and differences between him and his father as a baby. Certainly, like his Dad, he has a fine head of hair!

Our Easter weekend was also blessed with a visit from Eldest Son (ES), his wife and First Grandchild (FG). It had been almost three months since we had last seen FG and I had been suffering something like withdrawal symptoms from not having seen him for such a relatively long time. It was great to see his development since the New Year and now we have a whole new set of videos and pictures of him to look at on repeat.

During a spectacular sort out and tidy up of our top floor storage (following on from a huge effort to sort out her late Mum’s heirlooms and other stuff), Jane had dug out some of my, and our kids’, old and very battered Matchbox and Corgi model cars and a whole bag of old plastic animals.

*^{Thunderbird 2 And Lady Penelope’s Car: Battered But They Have Been Through A Lot!}*

FG loved these old toys and it was great to see him using his imagination (and his new regard for Batman) as he played with them. He was also demanding in his requests that we also participated in his play. The refrain: “Grandad (or Granny), come and play” was frequent. When I did get down and play, but also tried to have a conversation with someone else or do anything else at the same time, I heard him plead “Grandad, come and play, you keep stopping!” Irresistible!

A highlight was an Easter Egg hunt around the garden following chalked arrows pointing to the route and egg hiding places. FG struggled at first with the concept of arrows pointing to things but he loved finding the eggs with a bit of help and then collecting them in a little bag. His parents were left with the awkward problem of how to manage the unprecedented volume of chocolate in his possession.

The anticlimax that always follows a visit from the Edinburgh branch of the family is offset this time. First, it is only three weeks before we travel to Edinburgh to babysit for a few days while FG’s parents go to Spain for a wedding. Second, we now have a Bristol baby just 45 minutes away to fawn over. We are loving the prospect of seeing SG’s development, and the developing parenthood of MS and his fiancé, in a more ‘little and often’ way than is possible with FG.

It’s all so exciting and it’s enhancing the bounce I always get as Spring arrives.

Various (so far) minor but irritating health issues have reminded me of my mortality in the last year or so. This was underlined by the death of one of my friends from university just before Easter. I once thought that as long as I lived to see my sons settled and had a grandchild, I would be happy to ‘pop my clogs’. Now, of course, I want more. I want to see more of my expanding family and see the grandchildren grow up. We can’t have it all but, so far, so good.

Darn It!

January 28, 2024January 28, 2024 / fgrtommo / 2 Comments

One of my New Year resolutions was to do more creative things. I think I have met that challenge, albeit rather mundanely this month, by darning several pairs of socks. I had bought the materials to do this some time ago but had left them languishing in a drawer. I got them out again and followed a YouTube video showing me how to bring a bunch of socks back to life. I admit that the holes were quite small and the finished products are not works of art, but I was proud of myself for doing it rather than just throwing the socks away and buying new ones.

^{Not Beautiful But Newly Functional}

My wife Jane has also been darning and even went on a workshop to facilitate more complex darning processes than I had attempted. Her main output was a repaired soft toy – called ‘Robert’ apparently – that my late mother had knitted for our Middle Son (MS) and which he still remembers adoring as a small child. MS and his fiancé are expecting a baby in March and, touchingly, MS wanted the baby to have a smartened up ‘Robert’ for his or her nursery. As with my socks, the repairs are, fashionably I’m told, very visible. Hopefully, both socks and ‘Robert’ will have a new lease of life.

*^{‘Robert’. 30 Years Old And Going Strong. Thanks Mum!}*

Most of my other New Year Resolutions have started well. I’ve been walking a lot, watching my weight and my alcohol intake, and have countered my fear of average, lukewarm coffee by going to a cafe with Jane when she has requested (only once so far). I’ve reduced my intake of the miserable world news a bit. I’ve also remembered to do my back exercises on most days and although they are limited, they are also pain free. While doing them, I have enjoyed remembering that these exercises weren’t really possible a year ago after I put my back out with an unexpected, untimely and big sneeze; that’s good progress.

Only the gardening resolution is untouched but, so far in January, the weather has been either too cold and frosty (lovely to walk in), too windy or too rainy. Climate chaos certainly seems to be producing very varied winter weather and convenient excuses not to get out working in the garden.

^{Frosty Mornings On The Way Into Town}

In the last two or three weeks, there has been plenty of cloudless sky in between the storms. Jane and I had a lovely walk through some woods on the other side of the Stroud Five Valleys from our home. Lack of parking places forced us to alter our plans slightly but it is always rewarding to find new places to stroll through and the Five Valleys are blessed with a vast network of well-tended footpaths.

*^{Striding Through Sunlit Oldhills Woods On The Chalford Biodiversity Trail}*

I have revisited some of the long walks around our village for the first time for months. I’ve loved these sunny walks, their views and their solitariness and the time they give me to think (but not about very much). The frozen ground meant there were no worries about the mud and the mix of bright sun and deep frost everywhere has been spectacular at times.

*^{I Love This Old Barn Complex. I Hadn’t Been Past It For Ages}*

Some of the recent winter sunrises have been spectacular too.

Spring is on its way. I often find upcoming February is the toughest month to negotiate; I get impatient for the ever longer days and daunted by the amount of work there is to do to prepare the garden for planting. Darn it, perhaps I should have focused a little less on mending socks in recent days, and a little more on gardening so as to have got ahead of tasks on the vegetable patch and in the field. Even in retirement, time is too short.

New Year, New Trip

January 13, 2024 / fgrtommo / 2 Comments

We chose Belfast rather than Edinburgh for Christmas but I couldn’t wait to see First Grandchild (FG) again and so we pitched up in Edinburgh early in January. The added benefit of going then was that we could celebrate Eldest Son’s birthday with him. As ever, we had a great time and experienced wonderful hospitality.

We did some of the usual things with an enthusiastic FG. We spent a morning exploring the National Museum of Scotland and another wandering through the Royal Botanic Garden. Both are great places to take toddlers and FG is very chatty now so trips like these are more pleasurable than ever.

*^{Morning Across Edinburgh To The Pentland Hills From The Royal Botanic Gardens}*

FG also has a soul mate in my wife, Jane, when it comes to visiting the cafés in these places. Since I have pledged to overcome my fear of lukewarm/weak café coffee, and have added going to cafés when requested by Jane to my list of new year resolutions, I went along willingly with their desires.

We had driven up to Edinburgh and the journey was smooth with no problem with charging up the battery. As a result, we had the option to drive FG and his parents beyond Edinburgh for an outing. Since the weather was cold but clear, we chose to go to the beach at Yellowcraig near North Berwick.

We had a lovely time passing FG sticks, stones and chunks of seaweed that he could throw into the waves amid Yellowcraig’s open vistas and its big skies.

^{Looking North To North Berwick Law And Bass Rock From Yellowcraig Beach}

Back in his flat, we threw ourselves into entertaining FG with drawing, tower building (and knocking them down), Playdoh moulding, and reading. FG takes these activities very seriously and loves having control; I love that and it makes the times when he simply laughs and messes about even more enjoyable. He’s developing so quickly.

Before FG arrived, my wish was to see a grandchild before I died but now, inevitably, I want to live for decades so I see more and see them grow up. We are so looking forward to the arrival of a second grandchild in Bristol in a couple of months.

We did slip off for some ‘me-time’ too. I walked down the Water of Leith to Leith town. I’ve done that before but this time I went a little further to the edge of the port. Leith is a vibrant town that is being transformed into a trendy outpost on the edge of Edinburgh with a new and frequent tram connection. Next time we will try to get to see the Royal Yacht Britannia which has been retired to a berth there.

*^{Late Afternoon In Leith And Leith Port}*

*^{One Of Antony Gormley’s Water of Leith Statues Clad In A Hibernian Football Shirt For New Year}*

I also wandered through Stockbridge to see some of my favourite residential areas of Edinburgh. We still debate whether moving to Edinburgh – or at least having a permanent second base there – would be viable and sensible. The best Georgian flats and houses are lovely to look at and dream of owning. More practically, a modern flat would be a better target but there’s no harm in looking!

*^{My Favourite (So Far) Edinburgh Square – Saxe Coburg Place}*

The drive home from Edinburgh always feels a lot less exciting than the journey up. Although charging up the car was again problem-free on the way, there was an hour-long stoppage due to an accident – a Range Rover towing a food truck strewn across three of the four lanes near Manchester – to further deflate the mood. But getting home is always a relief and a pleasure of its own. Now we are chilling out back in our weekly routine which includes evenings in front of the fire and series after series of streamed television.

Until the next trip to Edinburgh and more memory creation with the little one…..

Belfast Christmas

December 31, 2023December 31, 2023 / fgrtommo / 2 Comments

Christmas in Belfast started at a furious pace. Youngest Son (YS) picked us up from George Best City Airport and whisked us off to an Asian small-plates restaurant in the centre of town called Yugo. We had an early, swift and tasty dinner there before zooming off again to traditional Irish bar in the old docklands, The American Bar. Here, we met up with YS’s future parents-in-law and had a catch-up chat while staying well out of the way of the regulars who seemed very proprietorial about their seats at the bar.

Then we crossed the road to the Dockers Club for a gig by George Houston who was an excellent warm up act for Joshua Burnside. Both artists were amusing between the enlivening music and they both had songs with interesting lyrics.

It was a great venue; apparently the gig was sold out but it wasn’t too crowded. The acoustics were great. I could make out all the words of the songs as long as I didn’t stand behind the enthusiastic woman who thought she knew them all and thought we’d benefit from bellowing them out. Plus, the Guiness was creamy and proper. Seeing a gig in such a lively, functional venue was a real treat.

It was interesting to see YS and his fiancé bumping into several acquaintances and friends. Belfast is small compared to London where meeting up at a gig would be unlikely unless planned in advance. It is clear that YS’s partner has a huge network of friendships in Belfast through living in the city through her youth and, now, through her work as an osteopath and as a Pilates and yoga teacher. It is great to see how settled – and successful – they have become in Belfast.

It was late by the time we got back to their house and Reggie, their one-year-old dog was suffering cabin fever and then overexcitement as we walked in. Let’s just say he had an unsettled night of whining and moaning…. To be fair, he was very quiet on the other nights of our stay and he has settled down a lot since we last saw him in Spring. He no longer chews the furniture and stairs – though his history of this remains evident – and he is a very gentle dog whose only anxiety seems to be worry that everyone in his ‘family’ are close by. I’m looking forward to even more maturity by the next time we visit.

After that exciting first evening, the pace slowed and became very relaxing. YS loves a bit of technology and he has a huge telly with surround-sound in one room and a (pretty awesome) projector in another. That meant that while YS and I could watch football in one room, his partner and Jane could watch a stream of Christmas holiday movies in the other. The latter included Bernard and the Genie which we all watched. I hadn’t seen it since our sons were very young and was surprised that, amid the hilarity, some bits are amusingly inappropriate for the young.

We played games. YS won at HeckMeck as usual but Jane and I were dominant during my first exposure to Articulate! We had a hoot with that! I was less good at Jenga 😊

^{Ormeau’s Bread and Banjo Bakery – ExcellentAnd The Best We Have Found In Belfast So Far}

We ventured out to the independent shops in the local Ormeau area primarily to get some very good bread and bagels. Then, for the first time, we visited Lisburn Road, which also has an attractive range of shops, and picked up sherry and some interesting wine.

*^{Maven – A Cool Home Decoration Shop In Lisburn Road}*

I dipped out of some of the perusal of shops to walk through pleasant but wintery Ormeau Park. That enabled me to get exercise sufficient to enable conscience-free consumption later

*^{Carved In A Tree Stump With A Chainsaw By Hazy In Ormeau Park}*

On Christmas Eve we had a lovely walk along the Lagan River and into the woods near the Stanmillis Sluice Gates.

*^{Stranmillis Sluice Gate On The River Lagan}*

On Christmas Day we strolled through the Botanical Gardens and past the Queens University Sports Hall. There is a surprisingly large amount of interesting green space near to the dense but attractive residential housing of Ormeau – much needed with a dog as big and energetic as Reggie.

On Boxing Day, the weather was excellent in the morning and YS insisted that we fulfil what is becoming a tradition when we visit him in Belfast: a sunrise walk on a beach. Fortunately, its winter so the need to see the sunrise was less demanding on our sleep patterns than in the past.

*^{Just Before Sunrise – Helens Bay, Belfast}*

We went to Helen’s Bay and Crawfordsburn Country Park and it was empty and gorgeous.

*^{Helens Bay With Reggie At Full Pelt}*

Fortunately, especially early in our walk, there were few other dogwalkers. Reggie the dog is gradually becoming more manageable with other dogs but he is over-enthusiastic and provokes fuss and bother. Amusingly, when he gets into a tangle with another dog, YS and his fiancé’s strategy is to run away as fast as possible – not to ignore the problem, but to lure Reggie away promptly. It sort-of works and some other dog owners found it funny.

YS’s Partner’s Pictures Of Reggie At Helens Bay

Finally, it being Christmas and all, we ate and drank well. YS had bought a selection of excellent beers with strange names from Boundary Brewing.

On the food front, a highlight, of course, was the Christmas dinner itself which included YS’s terrific pigs-in-blankets. We also feasted on a huge selection of local cheese that had been provided by YS’s next door neighbours in gratitude for tolerance in the last 6 months while they built a very substantial extension on the back of their house. (Hopefully, one day, YS and his fiancé will be able to build an extension too!). Then, on our last night, YS’s fiancé made a delicious prawn and orzo dish that I will try out at home.

^{A Full Plate Of Christmas Dinner – Lucky Us!}

It was a lovely Christmas. Three years ago, Covid broke the mould of the succession of Christmas get-togethers with all of Jane’s family at our house. Then, two years ago, we decamped to the Isle of Skye for a small family Christmas with those sons and partners without a baby. Last year was a relatively small affair at our house with sons and partners that focused on First Grandchild as much as Christmas. And now we have done Belfast Christmas.

Next year the plan is to host at our house all three sons and their wives, partners and fiancés plus what will be two grandchildren by then. It’s only a plan but it is clear that the time for extended 15 to 20-strong family Christmas lunch has, passed for us and, now I have retired and have no work constraints, I can envisage that we may be even more innovative in Christmas location and composition in the future. Long may that continue. Lucky us. Happy New Year!

Winter Lights and Festivities

December 21, 2023 / fgrtommo / Leave a comment

Early December was cold and frosty; proper winter weather. I love walking around the village in weather like that, especially when the skies are clear and the sun is at least giving and impression of warmth.

On one rather cold evening, I walked to Forest Green Rovers to see the football team I support. On the way I saw the annual winter light display that Ruskin Mill College hold in the valley the college occupies among the lakes, the ponds and the trout fishery it manages. I was already a bit tight on time so didn’t attempt to get a closer look. However, on the way back – disheartened by yet another defeat in what has been a long succession – I walked through the base of the valley to see the remnants of the display.

*^{Ruskin Mill Light Display Including A Dragonfly Above A Lake and A Mouse}*

Many of the candles had naturally expired by that time and no-one else was about. The atmosphere was a strange mix of festivity and spookiness. The overall feel and several of the individual light-works were impressive. I felt lucky to have seen the display since it wasn’t officially open to the public and it only lasted a few hours.

Jane has been investing a lot of time in getting our own Christmas lights up around our house. We briefly debated whether to put a Christmas tree up this year since we are not at home for Christmas itself. However, I was unsurprised when she arrived back one afternoon with a substantial tree and spent the rest of the day decorating it. Jane loves Christmas and the tree looks lovely as usual.

*^{Domestic Festive Lighting – Door and Tree}*

The festive lighting around the house is also lovely. The excuse for it being even more extensive than usual is that, after several years of talking about having a drinks party for local friends and acquaintances, we finally arranged one.

I think it went well. It was great to see so many locals chatting animatedly with each other. Jane relieved the hospitality burden on us by hiring a youngster to man the ‘bar’. We both enjoyed the occasion while learning lessons about how to improve arrangements for the next one (should we get our act together again).

*^{Plenty Of Festive Lights In Our Bit Of The Hamlet}*

That weekend felt very full because Jane spent much of the next day at our house with her siblings, sorting out a load of boxes of her late mother’s possessions. Good progress was made I believe. However, it’s a big task and there are still a number of crates and boxes in our spare room and corridors to examine. The contents need to split into allocations by sibling, for charity, for the dump and for a celebratory bonfire of family memorabilia that no-one wants to keep. The creation of this last stack of stuff is in line, Jane tells me, with one of several Swedish death-related cultural practices that celebrate the past while preventing our lofts getting filled with junk.

Now, with our Secret Santa presents already bought and no big family Christmas dinner to prepare for, we are in a quiet and welcome gap between our drinks party and Christmas itself. For that, we are off to see Youngest Son and his fiancé in Belfast. I fear we must prepare for a rainy Christmas not a cold, clear one but we are intent on having a great time. I hope all you readers have a great festive period too!

Anniversary and Birthday in Edinburgh

November 28, 2023November 28, 2023 / fgrtommo / 1 Comment

Autumn is turning to winter but there is still some colour in the trees and the occasional sunny day provides a bit of autumnal sparkle. I continue to feel fortunate to live in a pretty (but not prettified) part of Gloucestershire and we enjoyed showing it off a bit while some friends stayed with us at the end of October. When the sun is low as it is now, the Cotswold stone of the houses glows beautifully and the crispening leaves on the trees glimmer in the breeze.

I am well behind on the bedding down of the garden and allotment for winter. I have made some progress but, when the weather has been nice, I’ve tended to take the opportunity to go for local walks. When the weather has been cold and wet, I’ve stayed close to the heating in our kitchen. I feel that, as I get older, I feel the cold more than I did.

Our First Grandchild (FG) doesn’t seem to feel the cold anywhere near so much! He is thriving up in Edinburgh. We visited Edinburgh recently to celebrate his second birthday and his parents’ first wedding anniversary. They have a lovely flat and, now there is a wood-burner in the lounge, a very cosy spot for the evenings. FG can now lark about before bedtime in his nightwear – or just his nappy – without me feeling chilly by proxy.

We stayed in Edinburgh for longer than usual but hopefully avoided overburdening the working parents by staying a couple of nights in a hotel rather than with them. FG seemed to enjoy having two more people to order about especially once his birthday brought more toys for us all to play with.

He also liked his usual trip with us to the Royal Botanic Garden, where we collected different colours and sizes of leaf. It’s a wonderful, free resource regardless of the time of year.

On the actual day of his birthday, we all joined him on an extended visit to the National Museum of Scotland where he joyfully rushed from exhibit to exhibit. It’s a great place for kids.

We had other lovely family outings in brilliant sunshine to Saughton Park, which had an interesting history and a goldfish pond which fascinated FG, and to Lauriston Castle gardens with its great views across the Firth of Forth. Much to Jane’s satisfaction, each visit involved a café stop. This is something that, when we are alone together, she finds hard to persuade me to indulge in. With FG, it’s another little opportunity to watch him develop.

*^{Lauriston Castle With The Firth Of Forth Beyond}*

It was convenient that we had our car, could get around easily with everyone, and that ES and his partner had some time off work so they could enjoy their anniversary and birthday fully.

Jane and I also went off on our own for perusal of Stockbridge’s shops (Jane) and walks by the Water of Leith (me). The Water of Leith was gushing more than usual following the recent storms which made the riverside walk somehow even more pleasurable than usual, especially as the sun was shining.

Views Along The Water Of Leith (Including An Anthony Gormley Statue Top Right)

We also managed to slide off for an hour in Spry, our favourite wine bar, and for a set of very tasty, innovative small lunch plates at Noto where Eldest Son (ES) and his partner had celebrated their anniversary a couple of nights before.

*^{My Walk Along The Water Of Leith Led Me To Murrayfield}*

While FG and his parents went off to a birthday party of one of FG’s contemporaries in south Edinburgh, Jane and I took advantage of more sunny weather to climb Blackford Hill. This afforded great views north of Arthur’s Seat and the city and I had a bit of an internal psychic glow knowing that this was where ES had proposed marriage.

^{Views North From Blackford Hill}

In between the anniversary and birthday festivities, and as the weather deteriorated, Jane and I visited the newly opened half of the National Gallery of Scotland. This great new space doubles the size of the gallery and has some excellent works including many by the Glasgow Boys and the less renowned Glasgow Girls.

*^{The New Galleries At The Scottish National Gallery}*

In a slight overdoing of cultural experience for one day, we also visited Dovecot Studios to see an exhibition called ‘Scottish Women Artists: Challenging 250 Years of Perception’. This too had art by the Glasgow Girls. I thought the exhibition was a bit uneven but particularly liked the works by Joan Eardley and a few others.

*^{Dovecote Studios: Scottish Women Artists (Including Joan Eardley And Alberta Whittle – bottom right and left respectively)}*

While we were in Edinburgh, ES’s partner cooked us lovely meals and we had great toast-laden breakfasts (Archipelago Bakery sells outstanding bread) plus a couple of substantial delivery meals from local food outlets. Fortunately, this visit, we met ES’s partner’s parents again and we all tucked into an Indian spread while sharing FG-stories.

FG’s birthday cake was a delightful mum-made ‘hedgehog cake’ with chocolate buttons for spines (he loved the candle blowing out process and the chocolate). Later, his birthday dinner was a shared set of delivered pizzas. Meals delivered to the door are rare treats for me; we don’t have them at home since the choice is limited and the distances feel too great. I put on weight in Edinburgh but it was well worth it.

It’s a long way to Edinburgh and back in our car (though we again had no real problems with charging it up as we travelled). But we love Edinburgh. Jane and I know that had ES not met someone from there who wanted to settle in the city, we would not have had such an opportunity to get to know Edinburgh so well. There is so much more to see there and we look forward to another trip for ES and his partners’ birthdays early next year.

A Lull In Proceedings

October 2, 2023 / fgrtommo / Leave a comment

A few weeks ago we were in Ireland and Edinburgh. Later this week we are spending a few days in Belgium. In between we have slowed down into more usual routines and come to terms with the fact that, despite unseasonably warm weather, the trees are starting to turn and Autumn is upon us.

*^{Some Of The Last Big Dahlias From The Garden This Year}*

There is still a lot to do in the garden before closing up for Winter. I’ve made some progress in that I have brought in an excellent harvest of potatoes and onions, have started to pull down the climbing beans and their frames and have collected the wood remaining from some cut trees from out of the field.

*^{Some Of This Year’s Bumper Crop Of Onions, Potatoes and Squash}*

However, I need to weed the currants and leeks, and harvest the squash and Jerusalem artichokes. I also need to dig over all the vegetable beds to give the bindweed and creeping cinquefoil another almost crippling blow before the end of Autumn. I say ‘almost’ since it cannot be eliminated, only managed.

^{Preparing For Winter – Wood Turned Into Wood Store}

A further project is to tidy up the compost heaps which have become very dilapidated. Jane will be upset that I will once again put together a rather improvised set of heaps using old pallets rather than use the purpose-built wood frames that she bought for me years ago. I continue to save those for when we move to our ‘Tin House’ (currently rented out) in Jane’s nearby childhood village of Amberley. The timeframes for that are vague but my short-term solution for the compost heaps will suffice in the meantime; I just need to get my skates on and do it.

*^{My Over-Full, Collapsing Compost Heaps}*

That effort needs to fit in alongside getting a grip on my small allotment in Amberley which I have held onto as another sign of our intention to move to the ‘Tin House’ at some point. Also, we have taken on a mini-project to help Middle Son (MS) and his partner to design and enhance his new garden in Bristol. This was a requested alternative from MS to a more typical birthday present. We really enjoyed delivering our first instalment of help while he cooked us a lovely roast lunch.

A low light of the last few weeks has been watching the steady decline of Forest Green Rovers (FGR) – the football club I support (enthusiastically through often through gritted teeth). Relegation last season following glorious promotion the previous season wasn’t entirely unexpected especially after our now much lauded manager left abruptly for Championship and, more recently, Premiership football. But we are struggling again this season and the disconsolate and disappointing defeat in the last match was very dismaying. What goes up can come down!

*^{FGR At Meadow Lane, Notts County. A Proper Football Stadium}*

On the other hand, a highlight in the last few weeks has been a weekend in Nottingham with my sister and Dad. I saw FGR play Notts County while I was there – we lost again, though only narrowly and a little unluckily – but what was most encouraging was seeing my Dad fighting his way back to the level of activity and health he had earlier this year. For a while this summer he was really struggling with a side-effect of the innovative, and seemingly successful, cancer treatment he has been on. Now that side -effect has been addressed, he has his mental agility and much of his strength back, and his treatment has restarted.

I stayed with my sister in her new house not far from my Dad, but spent the days with at my Dad’s house where we reminisced over tea, lunch and a game of Mahjong. We played with a lovely, intact, bone Mahjong set that has been in the family for ages. The feel of the bricks and the counters that substitute for money is wonderful. Dad was able to demonstrate his powers of mathematics were undiminished as he worked out who owed who and how much after each round. I lost all I had won when we last played back in May last year.

The rest of the month has flown by through a routine combination of the village men’s Talk Club (restarted after a summer break), a morning a week at the Food Bank, local walks solo or with friends, shopping for and then cooking good home food, and evenings of streamed television.

Our current streamed television of choice is Fauda on Netflix. It’s a gripping action series that develops interesting male and female, Israeli and Palestinian characters over four series. We are about to watch the last episode and we shall miss it a lot when it’s over. The last series is partly set in Belgium. I think later this week we will be visiting rather different parts of the country from the vast, labyrinthine housing estates depicted in Fauda!

Proper Baby-Sitting and Grayson Perry

September 21, 2023 / fgrtommo / Leave a comment

We have babysat First Grandchild (FG) a few times for short periods during visits to Edinburgh during the last year or so. It’s been a joy and a privilege to be able to do so. Plus we always enjoy visiting his parents and seeing Edinburgh.

*^{The Water of Leith From Dean Bridge – The Steep Gradients So Near To The Centre Of Edinburgh Still Surprise Me}*

Our baby-sitting responsibilities went up a notch at the beginning of September when First Grandchild’s (FG’s) parents went to a wedding of an old friend in Spain. Jane and I were thankful to be asked to baby sit for the 36 hours they were away but were unsure how the experience would go for us and for FG.

His other grandparents do a lot of babysitting and look after him all day on Thursdays. But it would be the first time that someone other than a parent would get FG up in the morning (twice), manage his afternoon nap (twice), put him to bed (once), plus feed, entertain and keep him safe in between. It was our first go at proper grandchild babysitting!

Eldest Son and his wife had departed in the small hours of the night. Apart from 15 minutes of full-on anxiety and yelling after he woke up that morning, and another five minutes of low-grade moaning after his first nap, FG was fine with the whole weekend.

*^{First Grandchild Exactly Where We Wanted Him – Asleep With His Monkey and Other Soft Toys}*

FG knows his routine down to the fine details: which soft toy needs to be kissed goodnight in what order, which book is the last book to be read before bedtime, which bedroom light goes on and off when. As long as we stuck to that routine and provided plenty of book reading, tower and garage building, and other activities at other times, he was very happy. FG, his parents in Spain and, certainly, the two of us, all had (tiring) fun.

Of course, we visited a few Edinburgh playgrounds and, as usual, the Royal Botanic Garden with FG while we were with him. The weather was kind to us and we were able to walk, to and from everywhere and around the gardens, at FG’s pace.

Like most kids his age he loves being able to take mini-decisions about what to do when and, as grandparents, we have the time to allow that. That Jane has had a motherhood bringing up three boys and then a career in providing parental advice to troubled mums and dads really helps. I learnt a lot from her about how to give toddlers options so they feel a semblance of decision making while the adults actually remain in control.

A highlight with FG was a trip to Portobello beach. We got there early so the crowds were yet to gather in large numbers in the sunny and warm weather. FG loves the outdoors and the novelty of visiting the coast. He loved wandering along the shoreline and collecting shells and other debris along it (and, in some sort of memory throwback to my own childhood, so did I). It was a great way to spend a morning.

*^{First Grandchild (FG) And Granny On Portobello Beach}*

Another morning with FG was consumed with a trip on the new tram service to and from Leith. FG was more concerned with engaging with fellow passengers willing to smile at him than with looking out of the window. He enjoyed the journey and a big vegan biscuit at Williams and Johnson Coffee Co. Leith appears to be an increasingly cool place to live and work and the tram extension is surely a catalyst for that.

Before FG’s parents shot off for their whirlwind jaunt to the wedding, we managed a good dose of art and culture by visiting The Scottish Gallery, a nearby private gallery we have visited several times before, and the National Gallery of Scotland.

*^{‘Folk At Heart’ At The Scottish Gallery, Edinburgh}*

The Scottish Gallery was showing a range of artists embracing traditional folk art. Although the gallery is quite small, there was plenty to admire. I particularly liked the woven baskets, the muted colours of some of the naïve style paintings and prints and, downstairs, the textiles by Jane Keith which were innovatively displayed given the compact space.

*^{Textiles By Jane Keith At The Scottish Gallery}*

The headline exhibition at the National Gallery was a substantial retrospective of Grayson Perry’s work. I’ve enjoyed Grayson Perry exhibitions before – notably the Summer Exhibition at the Royal Academy in 2018 and, more recently, in Bath. The latter was a small exhibition of his ceramics where Grayson explained the pieces in his own words.

Grayson provided the captions for each piece at the National Gallery exhibition too and, apart from the art itself, this was one of the most attractive features of the show. His art is very accessible anyway but his thoughtful captions alongside each piece were unpretentious, clear and highly explanatory of the themes that have dominated his work since he was a very young man and how they have developed in his mind.

*^{Examples Of Grayson Perry’s Ceramics, Iron And Tapestry Works – With Typical Intense Detail}*

From the first work – a plate he made in 1983 called ‘Kinky Sex’ – the irreverence of his approach and the courage of his anti-establishmentarianism came through. But rather than be just a series of bold, even brash statements, the exhibition and particularly Grayson’s own words, drew me into what I see the Guardian newspaper calls ‘a thrumming conversation’.

*^{Grayson’s ‘Tomb Of The Unknown Craftsman’ (2011)}*

Some of the pieces on show were beautiful to my eyes, some were rather ugly, but every one of them had something to say and was engaging in some way. Rather than say more here, this is a link to a video hosted by Grayson describing much of the show: Grayson Perry’s Smash Hits. Watch out for references to ‘Alan Measles’ who is Grayson’s (troubled) childhood teddy bear who, entertainingly, crops up in various guises throughout the exhibition.

*^{‘Kenilworth AM1’ (Including Alan Measles’s ‘Stunt Double’ In The Box On The Back)}*

The only downside to the exhibition was that, somehow, I missed the last room and exited prematurely. Nonetheless I thought it was brilliant.

As was the whole weekend! Proper baby-sitting was a resounding success and we look forward to doing it again (we are scheduled for a longer stint in April next year during another Spanish wedding trip).

Having said that, it was great to get home, slot into routines less driven by a 21-month-old, and have a bit of a rest in what remained of summer in our home and garden.

After An Irish Wedding

September 10, 2023 / fgrtommo / Leave a comment

I got up a little gingerly on the morning after the wedding. My alcohol unit count and monthly quota had taken something of a battering the day before and my head was a little fuzzy. It was a blessing then that the relatives of the bride and groom had laid on a lovely lunch with more drinks, at the wedding reception venue at Ballycurry. I had enough scope in my alcohol unit quota for a ‘hair of the dog’ or two.

By now, after a damp start, the weather was gorgeous and the manor house and estate looked splendid. After an excellent buffet lunch, we had the opportunity to see one of the recent ventures the bride’s brother has initiated to diversify revenues into the estate farm. This was a substantial film set that has been used by the BBC and, latterly, for streamed series such as Vikings and The Last Duel. The scale of the set was impressive and now the trick will be to find new ways of using it for further dramatic series.

*^{The Film Set With The Estate House Beyond}*

The next day, our last full day in Ireland, again started with dreary weather. We considered abandoning ill-formed plans to visit local gardens and to visit Dublin’s galleries and museums instead. But as we left our Airbnb, blue sky appeared and we headed east over the mountains again to Glendalough.

This is an ancient monastic settlement, set in a glacial valley, and now a big draw for tourists. We arrived just in time to find a parking spot among hundreds of cars and a fleet of large coaches. The ruins of the towers, monuments and chapels are very picturesque. The quaintness of the scene was enhanced by the presence of semi-tame deer mooching between the gravestones despite the crowds.

*^{Deer Amongst The Gravestones At Glendalough}*

Rather than loiter among the throng of tourists, or embark on the suggested nearby woodland walks, we headed off to lunch at Powerscourt Gardens.

*^{Powerscourt Gardens (Including, Apparently, The Longest Herbaceous Border in Ireland)}*

The mansion at Powerscourt was destroyed by fire in 1974 and has been restored since as a tourist destination with a few high-quality shops (including a couple of Jane’s favourites) and a restaurant. We were able to bag a restaurant seat by the window overlooking the 47 acre expanse of formal gardens and arboretum. The view was great and the food was excellent quality and value.

*^{Powerscourt Gardens And Great Sugar Loaf Mountain}*

We worked lunch off a bit with an extended walk around the gardens. These are varied in format and large enough to absorb the large number of visitors, especially as we moved away from the main building. The sun was creating lovely dappled shade, the borders were full of colour, bees and butterflies, and the views were splendid. I enjoyed our relaxed time at Powerscourt very much.

Our penultimate excursion (apart from one final, smooth charging up of the car) was again to the coast. We visited Bray Head with the intention of walking along the coastal path for a while. Unfortunately, this was shut due to a recent rockfall so we ventured up towards Bray Head. This was a steep and stony climb that, until we reached the top, afforded none of the expected views of Bray or the coast to the north.

^{Looking South and North West From Bray Head}

Eventually I made it to the top of the tree line to get some long views up the coast and across to the Wicklow Mountains but I eschewed the final scramble to the imperious, concrete Bray Head Cross which was built in 1950 and from which, I imagine, the vistas are even more spectacular.

*^{Bray Head Cross – It’s Bigger Than It Looks Here}*

Jane had one more thing on her bucket list for the trip before we left for Roslare and the ferry uncomfortably early the following morning. That was to visit a traditional, rural Irish pub. We popped into the one nearest to our Airbnb, Brennans in Kilteel, which was just inside Kildare rather than Wicklow.

*^{An Authentic But Rather Empty ‘Brennans’, Kilteel, At 6pm On A Monday Evening}*

As was befitting, I had a pint of Guinness (which took me fractionally over my 100 alcohol unit quota for the month but which was very nice and creamy). In a nod to our normal UK-routine we completed the Guardian newspaper Quick Crossword over our drinks. Then we headed back to our Airbnb to finish the Netflix Scandi-noir crime series we had started earlier in our trip, polished off the remaining chocolate and crisps, and had an early night. It was a pleasantly chilled evening to complete our busy day and our brief stay in Ireland!

Before An Irish Wedding

September 8, 2023 / fgrtommo / 2 Comments

At the end of August, Jane and I travelled by road and ferry to County Wicklow in Ireland to attend, and help celebrate, the wedding of a granddaughter of Jane’s aunt. This was a great opportunity to see a part of Ireland and a useful test of driving (and, critically, charging up) our electric car in a foreign country. We had decided to tack a free day on either side of the two days of the wedding events so we could get a feel for County Wicklow and space out the two 12-hour journeys to and from Ireland.

^{Leaving Fishguard, Approaching Roslare. The Ferry Trip Reminded Me Of My Childhood Trips To The Isle of Wight}

The only time I had been to the Republic of Ireland before was for a short conference in Dublin. I only really remember that trip for it being the only time in my working career that I was ever late for the start of a conference due to drink-induced oversleeping (I had previously prided myself on turning up no matter what). During this latest visit, the drinking was much more moderate, the wedding celebrations were lovely and we had a very good time.

We stayed in an Airbnb on the west side of the Wicklow Mountains – the opposite side from the location of the wedding. That meant more driving for Jane (since she didn’t really trust me in the narrow lanes) but it enabled us to see much more of County Wicklow and the eastern edge of County Kildare. Having our own car allowed a comfortable familiarity and charging it up was relatively easy, although more expensive than in the UK.

Our Airbnb was in a renovated and repurposed farm outbuilding amid a lovely garden that is periodically open to the public – June Blake’s Garden. At the time of our visit the flower beds were packed with colour. The dahlias (I have come to love this species of plant) were particularly gorgeous. It was lovely to stroll through the garden and among the restored farm buildings whenever we went out to the car or just to put the recycling out.

*^{June Blake’s Garden, Blessington, Wicklow}*

Armed with information from the Airbnb host, the bride to be and a travel blog I follow by someone living in Ireland (Marie at HopsSkipsandJumps), we ad-libbed our itinerary and set off on our first free morning to the National Botanic Gardens at Kilmacurragh. The meadows, trees and one long flower bed that was full of interesting plants and masses of bees and butterflies, were lovely and the weather was kind.

*^{National Botanic Gardens, Kilmacurragh}*

We then headed to the town of Wicklow for a perusal of the county town and lunch. Already we were finding the Irish people very friendly and, as we sat on the quayside with our fish and chips, a quip from a passer-by, “ahh, fine dining!”, made us giggle.

*^{Wicklow Town Docks – Perfect Spot For Fish And Chips!}*

We took a look at the remains of a Norman castle, (The Black Castle) on a promontory overlooking the town. We loved the views along the coast in gorgeous sunshine.

^{Views From The Black Castle, Wicklow Town}

Jane wanted to visit the hand weaving mill and shop at the ancient and pretty rural settlement of Avoca. Having negotiated our way down some very narrow roads to Avoca and wandered around the shop, we returned to the coast for a wander along one of the long and surprisingly empty beaches on the Wicklow coast.

We then headed home equipped with bits of fruit, nuts, chocolate and crisps for an evening in front of Netflix. To be honest we didn’t eat very healthily until we got to the wedding reception but we did enjoy The Lørenskog Disappearance, which is yet another European crime thriller in which we seem to specialise.

Next morning was rather grey and drizzly. We ventured a quick walk and a breath of fresh but damp air around a section of the nearby Blessington Lakes. These were formed over 50 years ago when the Poulaphoca Dam was built.

*^{Blessington Lakes And Low Cloud Over The Wicklow Mountains}*

Fearing rain, we headed back to the Airbnb to change into our glad rags. In my case that involved squeezing rather inelegantly into a morning suit that I hadn’t worn for decades and that I first wore at my own wedding over 38 years ago. It was a little tight to say the least!

Then we were off to the wedding ceremony. The wedding service, in Nun’s Cross Church, Killiskey, was lovely and cheering. The weather perked up for the photos on the way out and we made our way to the wedding reception.

This was in a giant marquee directly in front of an impressive country house owned by the bride’s family. The estate is managed by her aunt and uncle and, latterly, her brother. The setting and arrangements for the reception were both marvellous. The marquee was laid out for around 170 guests and we all enjoyed an evening of plentiful drinks, lovely food (especially the local lamb), dancing, mingling and celebrating.

It was a late night by the time we got back to the Airbnb, but it had been a thoroughly memorable day.

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