Month: December 2022

Three Property Purchases and a Funeral

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Last month we went to a funeral for a very popular, lovely, family man almost 10 years younger than me.  He had died suddenly leaving his family and friends shocked and bereft.  It was an absolutely packed and emotional church service – he was a terrific guy who was enormously popular – followed by an equally packed reception.  The whole occasion was very moving and I have thought about it a lot since. 

Avening, Church Of The Holy Cross

Of course, the overriding feeling during the service and afterwards was sadness that it represented a life cut short, especially as he was so full of life, he had looked so well and was so obviously a vital part of his family, the organisation he worked for and his local community.   However, the speeches and readings at the funeral were largely an uplifting celebration of his life.  There were many amusing anecdotes and also a lovely poem by David Harkins that provided a positive slant on death that gave a little boost even in such a sad situation.

You can shed tears that he is gone
Or you can smile because he has lived

You can close your eyes and pray that he will come back
Or you can open your eyes and see all that he has left

Your heart can be empty because you can’t see him
Or you can be full of the love that you shared

You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday
Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday

You can remember him and only that he is gone
Or you can cherish his memory and let it live on

You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back
Or you can do what he would want: smile, open your eyes, love and go on.

Into this mix of shock, sadness and a celebration of a life well lived, was a feeling of being the recipient of good fortune in that I am still here and reasonably healthy.  I have seen three sons settle with three delightful partners and seen Eldest Son produce a wonderful child with his wife.  And, this year, I’ve seen all three sons purchase homes with their partners that are each very different but which seem very well suited to each pair; a flat in Edinburgh, a terrace house in Bristol and a semi-detached house in Belfast.

Old age may bring aches, pains and worse but it is a privilege to have had longevity to be able to see our sons grow and establish themselves in the world, to be happy and to establish a platform into which they could introduce new life.  As I stood in the crowded church at the funeral, I thought: lucky me.

Late Afternoon Walk With Middle Son And His Partner Near Their New Home In Bristol

Even as Christmas approaches and we look forward to hosting our sons and their partners at various times over the Christmas period, Long-Suffering Wife (LSW) and I are starting to think about making the most of our time with a few trips next year.  First, we want to get to Belfast to see Youngest Son’s new house but we will be trying to visit Edinburgh too and, I hope, spending smaller but more numerous fragments of time in nearby Bristol.  Plus, after a few years of abstinence, we want to travel abroad again.

Meanwhile, I continue to potter through my local routine of walking, shopping, cooking, and working a bit for the local Climate Action Network and Food Bank.  In recent cold, clear weather, the local walks have been a real treat.

Plus, of course, I have been watching a lot of football at the World Cup.  Qatar may have been a crazy choice for a number of reasons but the overall quality of the football has been great.  For all the concern about the Qatari views on LGBTQ rights and workers rights, it has been a pleasant change to see the joyous, ebullient crowds in the stadia in contrast to the thuggery and tears at Wembley at the Euros a couple of years ago.

My normal routine was also interrupted but enhanced by a trip to Lewes in Sussex.  I tagged along with LSW who wanted to visit a specific shop called Freight there.  It was a long way to travel for a shop but it was very much LSWs thing and Lewes is a very attractive town. 

Harvey’s Brewery And St Michael’s Church, Lewes

Harvey’s brewery is based in the town and the smell of hops was delightful as we walked down the high street.  It is a smell that reminds me of my home town of Reading which was the home of Courage breweries in my youth.  I love it. 

After a very good value and pleasant lunch at Bill’s, LSW and I split up for a bit.  While LSW surveyed the shops, I wandered around the town’s castle and gardens.  The gardens are a bit bleak at this time of year but the weather was fine and the views from the visitor-friendly castle were pretty impressive in all directions. 

Views Of And Views From Lewes Castle

Since getting back home, the weather has been very cold and then surprisingly snowy.  We had about seven inches of snow and it stuck around for almost a week.  My Yaktrax Ice Grips allowed me to continue my normal round of walks to and from the local towns and the frost and snow made the local countryside en route even prettier than usual.  A week of such weather is, though, enough in my book; I am looking forward to temperatures rising a little bit before Christmas.

Frosty Weather In Nearby Ruskin Mill Valley
Snow In Our Hamlet And Garden

And so on to Christmas!  Hopefully our sons and their partners will be able to avoid the issues caused by strikes and weather to make it down to us from their various new abodes.  Then we can feel so lucky all over again…..

A Cold And Not-So-Lucky Grey Heron In Ruskin Mill Valley

Onwards to Dundee and Edinburgh

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Having stayed a couple of nights at the small, tasteful and quirky Taybank hotel, Long-Suffering Wife (LSW) and I moved on and stayed for further couple of nights in Dundee at a large, modern Premier Inn.  This was right on the Tay estuary, over which we had a great but very windswept view. 

The Tay Bridge At Dundee

It was also conveniently close to the new V&A Design Museum outpost in Dundee.  This is a wonderful building, designed by Kengo Kuma.  The museum provides a video explanation by Kuma of why the museum looks like it does and that made it even more interesting for me.

Dundee’s V&A

The weather was intermittently very wet (dreich is the appropriate Scottish word I believe), so we went to the dry comfort of the V&A twice.  We took in not only the standing exhibitions, but also the temporary ones including a very comprehensive and wide ranging one about Plastic: ‘The Remaking of Our World’.  Fortunately that was every bit as interesting as the big exhibitions I have seen in recent years in the V&A London.  It’s great that Dundee has such an impressive centrepiece.

The V&A And RRS Discovery And Some Sun!
V&A Dundee: Part Of The Plastics Exhibition

While in Dundee, LSW did start to eat again following the illness she had picked up from First Grandchild (FG) the previous weekend.  However, she quickly regretted it and, with the rain still persistent, our movements were limited.  Then, for a while, the weather relented and we did make it to the McManus Art Gallery and Museum.  This is a lovely looking building exhibiting proudly the seafaring and industrial history of Dundee, its art and its most famous people.  Then,, as the weather closed in again, we visited the Dundee Contemporary Arts (DCA) centre. 

The McManus Galleries, Dundee (And More Sun!)

At the DCA we saw an exhibition by Manuel Solano.  He became blind after contracting AIDS and, incredibly, the exhibition contained just work that he had produced since losing his sight.  Another interesting hour was passed out of the showers. 

Manuel Solano In The Big Spaces Of The Dundee Contemporary Art Gallery

While at the DCA we also saw Living, a new and very moving film starring Bill Nighy.  He is perfect for the lead role and is supported by excellent acting all-round in a really lovely film.  We both enjoyed it hugely. 

It was great to have visited Dundee and to see a different Scottish city.  The weather changed our plans of what to do there and the rain reinforced our impression that the car was king along the city’s coastline since we seemed to spend a lot of time getting wet waiting for the little green man lights and for the traffic to allow us to cross.  But, given the tricky weather blowing in from the East, and given that LSW wasn’t fully operational, we did a lot of good things in Dundee. 

View From Our Dundee Premier Inn Room (When It Wasn’t Sunny!)

On our way back to Edinburgh via the coastal road around East Fife we had to take a couple of diversions to avoid flooding.  We spotted the huge waves off the coast as we passed the famous golf course and lovely buildings of St Andrews and decided to stop at the fishing village of Crail on the easternmost coast of Fife to take a closer look.  We parked and walked down pretty, narrow lanes to the harbour.  As I rounded a corner to get a closer look at the breakers and take a souvenir picture, I was astounded to be instantaneously splattered by sea spray even though the sea was 40-50 yards away.  It really was startling weather.

Crail Harbour

We drove on along the coast and stopped at a recommended coffee house in St Monans (The Giddy Gannet) where LSW managed half a scone.  Then we pressed on and had lunch at The Ship Inn right on the coast in Elie where LSW watched me eat a tasty plate of fish and chips with all the trimmings.   Then, with one of us rather more stuffed than the other, we set off for a final 36 hours or so in Edinburgh.

Back In Edinburgh: The Royal Mile

Remarkably given the pressures and events of the last few days, Eldest Son (ES) and his wife were entertaining again (with help from her Mum), this time to celebrate her Dad’s birthday.  It was a lovely evening with, as usual, lovely food and a chance to meet one of ES’s new uncles-in-law and his wife.  Gradually LSW and I are getting to know our newly extended family.

To round off a momentous and lovely week in Scotland, (lovely despite what viruses and the weather occasionally threw at us), we had a few hours with FG including a visit to the National Museum of Scotland.  We had taken him there earlier in the year and he loved it again even though he was still recovering from his illness.  I previously vowed to take him to this wonderful museum whenever possible when in Edinburgh and that vow stands; it is so exciting for him and, as he grows up, I think it will retain his interest (no pressure FG!)