Value: Home and Away

August 2, 2026 / fgrtommo / Leave a comment

My life in retirement is one of pleasant routine interrupted – maybe I should even say disrupted – by occasional events. I get up at about the same time every day and have one of two breakfasts every morning; either fruit and yogurt with a bit of nut butter or, on days following the purchase of the best local sourdough (currently Leola in my opinion), bread or toast with homemade jam or Marmite. Lovely!

When at home, I have the same lunch every day; crunchy salad with feta and toasted seeds. Dinner is more varied since I only do about half the evening cooking and Jane, my wife, likes variety, but baked salmon filets or a two-day batch of dal are almost guaranteed by me each week.

*^{A View Near Ruskin Mill On The Walk To Nailsworth}*

After breakfast I do the 30 minute or so walk into the local town of Nailsworth for the day’s shopping and my, and a neighbour’s, newspaper. Jane can’t believe I’m happy to do this every day but there are about 8 different routes to take so this aspect of my routine does have variety.

*^{Another View On The Way To Nailsworth}*

There is also variety in the activities in late morning and the afternoon. These include regular but short periods of volunteering, gardening, administration of my simple affairs, more walking, reading about current affairs (and almost always snoozing for a bit during that) and, of course, occasionally writing this blog. Then at 5pm Jane and I, almost invariably, have tea and do the Guardian Quick Crossword together.

During the football season all this has to fit around Forest Green Rovers games (it’s so good to get back to proper football after the political and financial extravagances of the World Cup!)

After dinner, when there isn’t a Forest Green Rovers game, Jane and I watch streamed TV series. Usually, our mutual choice settles on European crime series in which there is a gory death in first few minutes (often followed by others) by a serial killer that needs to be found by a police man or woman with terrible personal issues. We are currently watching a Greek thriller of this ilk. At least the subtitles force us away from constantly looking at our mobile phones.

On Sunday’s and Friday evenings and on the monthly quiz night, we visit our local pub. (Incidentally, our Quiz Team insisted recently, and against my protests, on changing our longstanding team name to ‘Paul Hates Change’. Actually, I dislike the prospect of change rather than change itself but there was sufficient truth in the name that I couldn’t argue against the update.)

I think I’m gradually getting better at coping with the unexpected but I love sticking to all of my routine and our Friday evenings in the local pub are special. We go confident that there will be at least someone who we will meet and have a great conversation with; and the beer is great.

If We Don't To The Pub We Can Always Enjoy The View From Our Field's Seat — *^{If We Don’t Make It To The Pub, We Can Always Enjoy The View Of The Route To It}*

I bumped into one of my best local friends earlier this week to ask if, he was going to be in the pub on the coming Friday. He said yes and pointed out that of all the activities we undertake, going to the pub for the informal meeting of a few locals provides one of the best ratios in terms of effort input and value returned. I agreed and his summation got me thinking….

Over the last several years, Jane has made our garden wonderful. Despite the lack of rain over the last couple of months, it has matured and is still full of colour and insect wildlife. It is a pleasure to sit in with a glass of wine on sunny evenings. Of course, we lack the chat and gossip of pub-goers but Jane and I celebrated our 41^st wedding anniversary last week (rest assured that my daily routine was pretty much unchanged that day!) so we have plenty of shared history, offspring and other stuff to talk about. Perhaps this garden lounging is the lowest energy input activity matched against considerable value.

We recently went to the RHS Badminton Flower Show. It was great that such a prestigious flower show was just down the road from us this year. It was good too that we got there as it opened and before the most intense crowds of visitors.

*^{Flowers And Gardens At The RHS Badminton Flower Show}*

The gardens and the flower and plant tents were inspiring. This was especially true of the extensive show garden by Tom Stuart-Smith that was a reflection of the garden he had designed with Julia Rausing at Lasborough Park (which, in another outing and break from the routine, we had visited last month).

Tom Stuart-Smith's Garden At The RHS Flower Show — *^{Tom Stuart-Smith’s Garden At The RHS Flower Show}*

The show included a themed garden by a garden designer who lives in our village which made me feel good. But it was very hot and became increasingly crowded and, after a couple of hours, I’d had enough. It was a break from routine and I know I should do more to get variety into life. However, Jane’s garden feels as good as the individual show gardens at Badminton, its cheaper and easier to get to and a lot less crowded!

Jane's Recently Renovated Potting Shed — *^{Jane’s Recently Renovated Potting Shed}*

One other recent break from routine which was very enjoyable was to meet up with Youngest Son and his wife in Oxford. They had been over from Belfast to attend a wedding the previous day. We met up for coffee and then a very pleasant and sunny lunch on the roof of the Ashmolean Museum. We checked out the famous exhibition of Egyptian mummies and other relics in the museum and then had a good walk together through the Jericho area and along the Oxford Canal.

*^{Views Of Oxford: Bodleian Library, University Church And Divinity School}*

Next month we are having a more complete break from the norm. We are off on a rail trip to France and Italy. That will definitely be high effort and cost input but, of course, the pleasures promise to be huge in return.

I enjoy holidays more than I did when I had the pressure of work at either end of them. Nonetheless, I’m increasingly thinking about how I will cope out of my home comfort zone. Will the trains run on time? What about climate change and wildfires? Given we are staying in a series of hotels, will we have to eat out all the time? How many pairs of socks and other items of clothing will I need to take? Where will we do our laundry? Can I watch the Forest Green Games that I’ll be missing online?

It’ll be fine I’m sure but I’m already looking forward to the first Friday after we return and a reunion with local mates in the pub over a proper English beer.

Cooler Edinburgh

July 6, 2026 / fgrtommo / Leave a comment

We went up to Edinburgh, for our summer visit to Eldest Son and his family, in the middle of the latest English heatwave. We left early to avoid the worst of the heat but saw our car’s temperature gauge indicate a steady climb in heat as we travelled through the Midlands and Lancashire. Temperatures only leveled out at about 28 degrees Centigrade as we hit the hills and mountains of the edge of the Lake District and entered Scotland.

Then, as we approached Edinburgh from the south east, we noticed a low cloud over the Firth of Forth and, as we approached the city, this moved inland to envelop Arthurs Seat. By the time we got into the city, the haar – a cold sea fog seemingly peculiar to Scotland’s east coast – had pushed the temperature down 10 degrees. The haar cleared and the heat gradually returned but it was an interesting meteorological phenomenon providing a welcome break from recent heat.

Our exploits in Edinburgh over a long weekend were similar to those of previous short, summer visits. ES and his wife provided excellent hospitality, especially the food, and the entertainment we offered the grandchildren was reciprocated with some very funny moments. First Grandchild’s (FG’s) description of some sort of model of an erupting volcano at his nursery as ‘it was ridiculous actually’ was priceless. Plus, his interest in the placement of traffic cones on bus shelters, parking signs and statues along our bus route to the National Museum was very amusing.

'Traffic Cones In The Wrong Place!' — *^{‘Traffic Cones In The Wrong Place!’}*

The National Museum of Scotland is a banker for entertaining small children and FG loves it. We also paid a visit to the Royal Botanic Gardens, as we almost always do with FG and his new sister. The gardens look great at this time of year and the garden’s cafés and restaurants are excellent.

Edinburgh's Royal Botanic Gardens — *^{Edinburgh’s Royal Botanic Gardens}*

We had had to postpone this Edinburgh visit by a few weeks and I thought it would be too late to coincide with an exhibition of Joan Eardley work at the Modern Art Galleries of Scotland but I managed to catch it on its penultimate day.

'Catterline in Winter' By Joan Eardley, Modern Two, Edinburgh — *^{‘Catterline in Winter’ By Joan Eardley, Modern Two, Edinburgh}*

Over the last few years of visiting Scotland, I have come to love her paintings of land and seascapes created late in her short life in a small village on Scotland’s east coast. There were a few such paintings on show – some of which I have seen before – and I found them as impressive as ever. However, this show was an exhibition portraying work from all her life and I was less keen on the earlier items mainly painted in her then home in Glasgow.

;A Stove' And 'Sleeping Nude'; Earlier Work By Joan Eardley At Modern Two, Edinburgh — *^{‘A Stove’ And ‘Sleeping Nude’; Earlier Work By Joan Eardley At Modern Two, Edinburgh}*

Also, Eardley’s works on show were mixed with a similar number of paintings by other artists that the curators believed were influences on her. I liked several of these paintings but, frankly, the links to Eardley’s thinking seemed largely tenuous and I didn’t really ‘get’ the overall narrative that attempted to hold the whole exhibition together. Nonetheless, the exhibition was free (albeit with a donation) and well worth seeing.

I slipped away from the hubbub of grandparenting on a couple of other occasions. Once was to follow up on the extraordinary sight of seeing a tank rolling down the road outside ES and his wifes’ flat. I wandered over to St Andrews Square, where the tank was headed, to see the Armed Forces Day celebrations there in case they would have been of interest to FG. It turned out to be a bit of damp squib though; the tank appeared to be American (why? I wondered) and was one of only two significant military vehicles on show. There was little other entertainment available.

*^{Armed Forces Day, St Andrews Square}*

Much better was a tram trip out to Leith. I love New Town Edinburgh where ES and his wife live but Leith is a refreshing change.

_{Views of Leith}

The ostensible reason for going this time was to see up close the numerous huge yellow structures on the coast that we could see in the distance from ES’s flat. Whilst I couldn’t get as close as I wanted, I did get a good view of them.

'Minions' and 'Tripods', Port of Leith — *^{‘Tripods’, Port of Leith}*

They are the components for big windmills being constructed in the North Sea in the Inch Cape field near Angus to the north. The cylindrical pieces are ‘minions’ and the larger, latticed towers are called ‘tripods’. Nearby were some of the ships that will carry and install these. It seems that Leith Port provides a changing range of interesting things to see – on our last visit it was accommodating a huge Tasmanian ferry that had been built in Finland that that had to wait for the harbour in Hobart to be made bigger!

I strolled around Leith port and, since the weather was so nice, I skived off from grandfather duty for an extra 30 minutes to have a beer at Teuchters Landing, the sister bar to another in Edinburgh West End that we are very familiar with. I sat on a bridge with my pint watching the world go by for a while; naughty but nice.

It takes pretty much a day to get there and a day to get back but our visits to Edinburgh are always so rewarding. It’s lovely to see our family offshoot there. We love to see how they are coping with two lovely kids, how those kids are developing, and such a cool capital city.

*^{Cool Looking Edinburgh Basement Fern}*

Hot Garden at Lasborough Park

July 2, 2026 / fgrtommo / Leave a comment

Last week, in the height of the latest heat wave across southern and central England, we visited Lasborough Park Gardens. Local schools had closed for the day because of the heat and we wondered if the open day at Lasborough would be cancelled due to the heat. Hah! Was it Noel Coward or Rudyard Kipling who said ‘mad dogs and Englishmen go out in the midday sun’? Neither we or the National Garden Scheme who had organized the garden open day, were to be deterred.

It was, in truth, too hot for loitering beyond the shade offered by the garden (and, particularly, the woodland area which is currently being redeveloped). However, moving from one patch of shade to another offered very rewarding views of a beautifully colourful garden. The huge walled garden, overlooked by an elegant greenhouse that is full of diverse geraniums, was especially impressive.

*^{Parkland Surrounding Lasborough Park Gardens And The Wonderful Walled Garden And Greenhouse}*

The garden was developed by Julia Rausing, the wife of Hans Kristian Rausing. He is a Swedish billionaire and the son of packaging industrialist Hans Rausing. His grandfather founded the food-packaging giant Tetra Pak. Hans Kristian has a somewhat chequered past but, after marrying Julia, set up one of the largest philanthropic trusts in the UK and was knighted in 2025.

Julia collaborated with the famous garden designer, Tom Stuart-Smith from 2016 until her death in 2024. Money was clearly not much of a constraint in developing a wonderful garden and both the garden and the surrounding parkland continue to evolve.

One Of The Avenues In The Walled Garden., Lasborough Park — *^{One Of The Avenues In The Walled Garden, Lasborough Park}*

The current head gardener explained to us how Julia had insisted on including a huge number of roses rather than the grasses that are apparently the signature plants of most Tom Stuart-Smith gardens. He also explained how the current upkeep and enhancements of the gardens are continuing in line with Julia’s wishes and objectives and that Tom Stuart-Smith continues to provide periodic supervision.

Lasborough Park Gardens — *^{More Views of Lasborough Park House And Gardens}*

There were much appreciated and needed refreshments after the walkabout around the gardens. We left very satisfied with the afternoon and the rare opportunity to see up close the gardens only previous glimpsed on past walks in the area. We were glad of the air-conditioning in the car though!

The outing to Lasborough Park had capped a good week. Early June had included a number of various health scares (now resolved) for two of our daughters in law and my wife, Jane, and life started to return to normal and have a welcome uptick with arrival of Jane’s birthday. Middle Son, his partner and our Second Grandson (SG) came over to our house and I managed to serve up lunch using a great, and well tested, Coronation Chicken recipe from Thomasina Miers. We had a great time in lovely weather entertaining SG in and around our house and a stream adjacent to our garden.

My Coronation Chicken Salad - I Was Pretty Proud Of This! — *^{My Coronation Chicken Salad – I Was Pretty Proud Of This!}*

And the fun continued after Lasborough with a trip to Edinburgh to see Eldest Son and his family. More on that later…..

Boards of Canada and Memories

June 20, 2026 / fgrtommo / Leave a comment

I became aware of the band Boards of Canada about 30 years ago. I suspect, but don’t remember, that hearing them for the first time was one of many gifts of listening to the radio DJ John Peel late at night. Boards of Canada quickly became one of my favourite bands and maybe my all-time favourite.

They are an electronic duo – brothers – who were born in Scotland. They spent some of their childhood in central Canada. It seems to have been there that they picked up some of their earliest influences including nature and cultural history as depicted in numerous documentaries by the National Film Board of Canada. Their music keys into nostalgia and childhood with themes including the environment, psychedelia and spirituality.

They have only produced five albums (plus a few early EPs). The fourth album was long awaited after a gap of seven years and we have had to wait another 13 years for their latest album: ‘Inferno’.

Fortunately, in my view, and in the view of most reviewers, it has been worth the long wait. It feels like the most structured and complete of their albums. The cut-up vocals have a sense of greater purpose than on earlier albums and the focus on religion, alien life signals and spirits is slightly unnerving but interesting. I love it!

I have played it through a few times. On my way back from the Food Bank where I volunteer once a week (a two-hour walk mainly along tree lined footpaths), I looked up some of the song titles on the Internet. With help from Google, I was able to get some inklings into what many of the tracks on the album are about and their underlying themes. I learnt about Nostradamus (‘Age of Capricorn’), Hindi Hell (‘Naraka’), the significance of 1420MHz, which is apparently is the radio frequency of hydrogen and a critical band for radio astronomy and the search for extraterrestrial intelligence (‘Prophecy at 1420MHz’), and much more.

Along My Walk To The Food Bank - Wild Garlic Earlier This Year — *_{^{Along My Walk To The Food Bank – Wild Garlic Earlier This Year}}*

I was particularly taken by the references on the internet relating to the track title ‘Memory Death’. This may well relate to the period occurs between clinical death (when breathing and circulation stop) and biological death (irreversible cessation of all cellular function) during which the brain may be active. Some have postulated that this period can last several minutes and that, during this time, the brain replays memories; some conjecture that it replays the best memories.

I was strangely moved by this concept. It got me thinking about what my best memories, to be replayed during my memory death, might be. To my shame I struggled to think of them. Admittedly I was walking and so not fully concentrating on the task of remembering, but I was shocked to find that, at first, all I could think of were relatively ‘bad’ memories.

For example, my earliest memory is of being alone at night in hospital having my tonsils removed. I was awake and kept flicking, no doubt noisily and irritatingly, a bit of loose Formica on a bedside table. I recall the nurse coming over and telling me off. I was four years old.

I remembered illnesses (measles, an infected leg, pneumonia), crashing a car in Kuwait before I had my driving license, funerals and one occasion of being reprimanded at work. I struggled in the moment to remember the good stuff. (My wife tells me that I shouldn’t have been so surprised at that since I’ve always been a bit of a half empty person).

Gradually I forced out some positive memories but I have resolved to find some time to think harder about those ‘good’ memories and perhaps write the best ones down. Goodness knows, there have been so many good experiences in recent years especially family holidays, the arrival of grandchildren and just in the everyday of retirement. But I wonder if I have become too reliant on recaps with the myriad of photos on my phone and have failed to sear memories and images onto my brain.

The Boards Of Canada Albums — *^{The Five Boards Of Canada Albums So Far}*

I’m going to think about this more and try documenting memories to help me remember how fruitful my experience of life has been. Meanwhile, I’m going to continue to listen to Boards of Canada and to hope there will be another album, even if we have to wait another 13 years for it.

A Tough Month For Alcohol Targets

June 4, 2026 / fgrtommo / Leave a comment

In 2005, when I was working hard, doing a lot of work-related socialising and then coming home at weekends to unwind, I started to plot the number of alcoholic drink-free days I was having. I’d read that one’s body (the liver especially) needed rests from alcohol to recover. I realised that I wasn’t managing those rests well and so started monitoring alcohol free days.

By 2017, when I retired, I had progressed from about a quarter of days being alcohol free to about a third. However, what I noticed after retirement was that, on the alcohol days, I was drinking more than I probably should. Guidelines had been issued by health bodies saying that 14 alcohol units per week was the approximate safe level of drinking. I felt that achieving that would be too ambitious but I started pairing the tracking of alcohol-free days with counting of alcohol units I drank each day.

By 2018 my target was to drink alcohol on no more than 50% of days each month and to restrict myself to 100 units of alcohol per month. That was much more than the guidelines but still challenging for me. My monitoring was helped by the MyDrinkaware App which helps calculate the units for each drink I consume. The advent of half-decent no-alcohol beers has also helped!

I have achieved both self-imposed targets since January 2021 and I’m pretty proud of that. However, even though my progress has plateaued, I am not inclined to push myself further.

It’s harder to achieve the targets in some months than in others. Months with 31 days mean I have to be alcohol free on 16 of those to achieve my target. Also, some months have more weekends than others and, despite retirement, the weekend is still when I tend to reach for wine and beer most frequently. Some months have Bank Holidays too. Plus, some months contain big celebrations or holidays. The May that has just passed was one such tough month.

May this year not only had its usual 31 days but there were two Bank Holidays, five weekends, my birthday and a brief holiday in Pembrokeshire to celebrate it, plus a ‘Hogfest’ beer festival at The Hog, Horsley, our village pub. I managed to achieve my targets but doing so was quite constraining in the last week of May and it got me thinking about whether I need to be so diligent.

The trouble is that the longer the period over which I have achieved the targets – over 5 years now – the more it seems a shame not to continue to meet them. As with all things, there is a balance to be struck. My physical health is almost all-important and all the evidence suggests that alcohol is bad for it; I’m lucky to have lived this long but I want to live healthily for longer. On the other hand, holidaying, socialising and relaxing with a glass of wine or chatting with mates in the local pub over a few beers is restful and, I think, healthy for the mind.

June, July and August are always challenging for me in terms of meeting my alcohol targets because it is often tempting to capitalise on the relatively sunny weather with a glass of wine in hand in the garden. But September is going to be the next really tough month for me. Then, we are off on a holiday in Europe where eating and drinking in cafes and restaurants will be a constant temptation – indeed, a requirement.

I’m determined that I will remember that the alcohol targets are self-imposed and are not incontrovertible. Maybe I’ll continue to meet them, but maybe short-term aims for a happy social life will get in the way.

Big Birthday Week

May 18, 2026 / fgrtommo / 3 Comments

I hit a birthday milestone a weeks or so ago; one of those relatively big ones with a 0 on the end. Birthdays seem less and less significant as one gets older but Jane, my wife, ensured that this one was celebrated with a lot of fun, enjoyment and very good memories.

My birthday week started, as it almost always does, with a Bank Holiday weekend. We didn’t exert ourselves much but I did make it over to a neighbouring village of Amberley where I have a small allotment. I picked some rhubarb and did some cursory weeding to show I’m still occupying the rather abandoned-looking vegetable patch.

My timing was perfect in that, while in the village, I could see the preparations for the Amberley Cow Hunt without having to press through any of the crowds that would be gathering later in the day. The Amberley Cow Hunt route is populated by a series of decorated pictures of cows, each illustrating a pun or other play on words. Each year, the cows on show seem increasingly sponsored by local business and ever more impressive.

Much of that weekend was taken up with gardening at our own home and visiting the HogFest, a beer, food and music festival at our local pub, The Hog at Horsley. As usual, the beer and entertainment there was various and good. A highlight was watching a singer in one of the several bands put her entire body, from head to foot, through a stringless tennis racket; impressive slimness and flexibility!

'Crazy Pony' Finishing Her Tennis Racket Stunt — *^{‘Crazy Pony’ Finishing Her Tennis Racket Stunt At HogFest}*

My birthday itself was marked by an excellent dinner with, to my surprise, a few local friends. I had vaguely been wondering why Jane had bought so much food given my expectation of a quiet dinner with just her. Then the table decorations started to look a little over the top for just that and, as she started cooking, she admitted that she was cooking for eight not two. We had a great evening.

Next day, birthday celebrations continued in Pembrokeshire. Jane had booked a room at Grove, a very luxurious hotel. She had also booked a ‘fine dining’ experience in their renowned restaurant. We wandered around the very well-tended hotel gardens which supply many of the vegetables and flowers they use in the hotel. Then we settled into the bar and restaurant.

The Grove Hotel From Its Gardens — Grove Hotel From Its Gardens

Our Evening View From Grove Hotel — Grove Hotel From Its Gardens

Fine dining it was! There were multiple courses from three appetisers through to three petit fours at the end. The small plates of food in between were little marvels. They introduced by the waiter/waitress who explained the incredible number of ingredients in each dish. The flavours were amazing and over the couple of hours it took to savour them all, we became too full to eat the petit fours which we therefore saved in a little box until the next evening.

Next morning we went into nearby Narberth to plot more modest eating and drinking arrangements for the evening. Narberth proved to be very pleasant. We had breakfast at Fforc where I indulged a little in a hearty Welsh fry up. We then wandered a little and particularly enjoyed The Malthouse which had a huge selection of antiques (almost all a step up from bric-a-brac) including antique maps, which I have always liked, and garden equipment.

Narberth (Ex-) Town Hall — *^{Narberth (Ex-)Town Hall}*

We came away with a large pot, an old dustbin for one of Jane’s roses, and a vintage watering can. This will replace the couple of old metal watering cans which both have holes that pour little streams of water on my legs as I carry them. The items we bought were all about a third the price of similar items in our Gloucestershire shops so we felt rather smug.

Since the weather was sunny and bright, we drove south to spend much of the rest of the day on the coast. First, we visited the extensive Stackpole Estate owned by the National Trust.

This was an excellent mix of cliff tops carpeted by wildflowers, precipitous views down to the sea, dunes, ancient woodlands and calm lakes and lily ponds. To take all this in involved a lengthy but relaxed walk. While I was enjoying all the sights enormously, I was also conscious of my fortune at being able to walk so much given the issues I had with my ankle and knee last year (and, now, my milestone breaking age!)

In The Woods And By The Lakes Of The Stackpole Estate

We had time to travel a little along the coast to St Non’s where, legend would have it, St David was born to St Non in stormy and unassisted conditions. The original chapel for St Non is now a ruin near the well where St David was apparently born, but there is a newer Chapel of Our Lady and St Non which was very sweet. Both chapels have great coastal views and are underpinned by a great story.

St Non's Chapels And Well — *^{St Non’s Chapels And Well}*

Before heading back towards Narberth, we popped into Stackpole Walled Gardens. These are run as an outlet for local people with learning disabilities but visitors are also allowed to walk around. The grounds, now being redeveloped, were clearly once a very grand series of walled gardens and greenhouses heated not only by the sun, but also by underground boilers. Our time there was an unplanned pleasure.

Also a little ad hoc, was our brief stopover in Tenby. This is a Victorian holiday resort that I recall from my last visit well over 50 years ago to be a busy tourist town full of amusement arcades and, for the 1960’s, fast food. Now it is a lot more sophisticated than my, probably faulty, memory. There are pretty terraces of Victorian houses, beautiful beaches, old and less old castles, and broad coastal views. We also found the lively Harbwr Brewery with its multiple bars and roof terrace for a welcome beer and an element of our more routine days – the Guardian Quick Crossword.

*^{Views Of Tenby (The Old Lifeboat Station – Bottom Right – Is Now a Residential Property!)}*

To round off the day we went back to Narberth for a drink in Hwb, a craft beer bar with pop-up food outlets. The beer was very good and the burgers were serviceable – a step or two down from the seven or eight course meal of the night before but just right in the context of our splendid and very full day out.

Next day we headed out fairly early to St David’s. The city – a city because it has a cathedral – is tiny; the smallest in Britain. Most of the mostly very pretty houses seemed to be holiday lets and there were many fewer shops than I expected. However, we managed to find a very good café called Minnow and we had healthy, tasty breakfast and very good coffee there.

We walked around the city for a bit hoping to find a newsagent that took my Guardian newspaper vouchers but failed. We ended up simply gravitating to the city centrepiece: St Davids Cathedral and the adjoining ruins of the Bishop’s Palace.

Ruins of the Bishops Palace, St Davids — St Davids Cathedral

The cathedral is in a beautiful setting and is very well preserved inside and out. The nave is unusual – if not unique. It slopes upwards by about four metres from one end to the other so that columns supporting the roof become progressively shorter towards the altar. Also, all the columns in the nave tilt outwards. This is apparently due to weak foundations and gentle earthquakes over the centuries. The cathedral is fascinating, beautiful and, when we visited, very peaceful.

*^{The River Alun Between St Davids Cathedral And The Bishops Palace}*

We passed on the opportunity to visit the adjacent Bishops Palace and instead decided to head towards home with a quick stopover in Solva. While Jane went off to find a wool mill and shop, I strolled up and along one of the headlands protecting Solva Harbour. It was a lovely walk past ancient lime kilns and along paths with wildflowers, big views and few people. It was a good way to end our stay in Pembrokeshire.

*^{Overlooking Solva: Pretty Paths, Lime Kilns and Headlands}*

I’m not going to celebrate being 70 again but we will hopefully revisit Pembrokeshire soon.

Talk Club When I’m OK

April 23, 2026 / fgrtommo / Leave a comment

Talk Club is a national mental health charity for men over 18 years of age. It was set up a few years ago by someone with a friend who had taken his own life, in part because he felt he had too few people to talk to about the things causing him anxiety. We live in a world where men tend not to spend a lot of time talking about their feelings. The aim of Talk Club is to help men improve their mental fitness by providing talking and listening groups that actively help men understand how they feel.

I am lucky that our little village of Horsley has a pub landlord who has cottoned on to this charity. He has taken the initiative to set up a weekly Talk Club in his pub along with a few of his chums who share the role of ‘captain’ for the meetings. I was lucky too that, about four years ago, a good friend in the village who was already familiar with this sort of group, persuaded me to attend this village’s instance of the nationwide network of meetings. I’ve been attending on a semi-regular basis ever since.

The group sessions follow a pattern which I outlined in a blog post shortly after I started attending. Each attendee is asked four questions in turn. The first and last question each attendee is asked is how are you feeling out of 10. Invariably scores tend to rise during the meeting for almost all participants – the process works in allowing us all to get things off our chests, feel listened to and feel a bit better.

Recently my scores have been particularly high and I have started to wonder why I continue to attend the Talk Club meetings. My knees and ankles have been less troublesome recently and, touch wood, my health generally has been in line with my increasing age but not a cause of anxiety. The onset of Spring has boosted my score (and that of other attendees) too.

Local Bluebells - Spring Unleashed — *^{Local Bluebells – Spring Unleashed}*

I’m also aware that I’m about double the age of most other attendees and my concerns – mortality, aches and pains and whether I’m going to manage to get my potatoes into the ground in good time – are very different from those of most others in the group who tend to worry about work, relationship breakdowns and looking after small children.

More Spring - A Crab Apple Tree In Our Garden At Peak Blossom — *^{More Spring – A Crab Apple Tree In Our Garden At Peak Blossom}*

Also, Easter at home with all our close family was a triumph for my well-being. It was just so lovely to have our sons, their partners and the grandchildren with us for quite a few days, the weather was good, the Easter Egg Hunt I had devised went well, and we all had lots of fun. Even amid the anticlimax of everyone leaving after Easter, the memories, helped by a plethora of video and photographs, are keeping me ebullient.

*^{Easter Egg Hunt With Maps This Year}*

Easter Fun

So, given my Talk Club meeting scores are so high, why attend? There are a few reasons.

Numbers attending each meeting vary from about eight down to three (or even on a couple of occasions, two). There is a need for attendance because otherwise there is an insufficient listening element. Participants need to disclose their feelings to others and so me just being there is valued. And I have seen how that listening helps; it has been exciting to see how some new joiners to our sessions have felt better progressively through their attendance.
One of the rounds of questions asks what we are grateful for. Historically, I, for one, haven’t spent enough time thinking about this. The Talk Club process forces that thinking and as the meeting progresses and others in the group talk about what they are grateful for, I am often prompted into thinking of additional reasons to feel grateful myself.
Another of the question rounds asks what we are going to do to improve our well-being in the next week. My answer usually fixes on a list of tasks rather than issues of diet, sleep and exercise which drive most other participants’ answers. But just sounding out the key actions to the group makes them more likely to get done.
My scores have been high recently but that hasn’t always been the case. I may be ‘ok’ now but when I’m not, at some point in the future, I will need the support of the Talk Club to help me. In that sense, attendance now feels like a bit of insurance for the future.
We have a laugh. Of course, not everyone feels good when they attend the meetings but usually someone will have an amusing story to lighten the mood. The meetings are confidential so these stories and other tales are not generally repeatable, but, in the moment, they are welcome.

I couldn’t attend Talk Club this week because my football team, Forest Green Rovers had a County Cup Final game and home football games take priority for me (and we won!). But I plan to be there the following week as usual. I’ll keep attending Talk Club while we continue to live in the village and the other members of the group also continue to see it as worthwhile.

I recommend Talk Club and other men’s groups like it to anyone over 18 especially if you are feeling down. I’d say that it is a valuable support in life whether you are feeling happy and relaxed or not.

Getting Back Into The Groove

April 1, 2026 / fgrtommo / Leave a comment

We spent the majority of February in Edinburgh and most of March relaxing back into our routine back at home. That home-based groove is pretty nice though. The weather has been mixed – warm and cold, sunny and wet by turns. But we live in a lovely and relatively quiet part of the Cotswolds. When the weather has been good, we have enjoyed rural walks, local pubs and the start of Spring with all the bird song and new growth that brings.

*^{View Across Our Local Town: Nailsworth}*

We have also, courtesy of Jane’s Christmas present to me, renewed our membership of The Newt Gardens in Somerset. We paid our first visit of the year there a couple of weeks ago. We haven’t been for about four years and there have been some notable extensions to the structure of the huge garden space. The weather wasn’t great so we restricted our explorations to the areas already familiar to us and the new ‘Four Seasons Garden’; we saved the ‘Roman Villa Experience’ for another day.

*^{The New ‘Four Seasons Garden’; The Newt, Somerset}*

The garden is very impressive. The centrepiece remains the ‘Parabola’ the top half of which is home to over 300 apple tree varieties. The trees are trained onto trellises or architectural shapes. The attention to detail here, and elsewhere in the garden, is incredible.

*^{Upper Part Of ‘The Parabola’: The Newt}*

We stayed for lunch in the main restaurant and that too was, as on previous visits, very good. We had a great table with a view over the ‘Parabola’. Beyond that we could see the vegetable and fruit garden, the topiary towards the hotel and then, even further on, the orchards on the slopes to the south west. Next time, we will come when more of the planting is in flower and the weather is more conducive to a longer excursion around the property, but we enjoyed the first of our membership visits very much.

Back home, I have slotted back into the normal mix of walking, daily shopping, volunteering at the Food Bank and local school, and watching my football team, Forest Green Rovers, struggle to regain their early season form. On the cultural side, I have increased the pace of my reading of novels (slightly). I have enjoyed that even if it has been at the cost of catching up on the backlog of The Economist magazines that built up while we were in Edinburgh.

^{My First Attendance At A Forest Green Rovers Womens Team Game}

Also, I caught up with an old acquaintance from when he was involved in the local Climate Action Network who had, bravely and impressively, organized an exhibition of portraits of progressives and activists he had painted. Whilst I didn’t like many of them much, they were good likenesses and the reasons for choosing to paint them were explained well.

Jane and I also saw Salt House, a threesome folk band from Scotland and the North of England, at our local Ruskin Mill. We had heard a lot of their music in advance on Spotify and loved it. We often caught each other, before and after the gig, humming the melodies. The gig itself was lovely, intimate and beautifully done. I will renew my attention to the list of future performances at Ruskin Mill since the quality is almost always exceptional.

Other highlights have been involvement in celebrating Second Grandchild’s second birthday in Bristol. Given my love of football, I was encouraged to see that his presents included a small football goal and a child size football. (The football was branded Arsenal to reflect his father’s preference but Forest Green Rovers have merchandise too so watch out……). Plus, last weekend, we hosted a couple from London who have been close friends for decades; it was great to catch up, chat and to eat well at home, at The Crown in Minchinhampton and, especially, Juliet in Stroud.

*^{Local, Village View In Glorious Spring Sunshine}*

Now we are planning a big family Easter get together. Fortuitously, life – whether in Edinburgh or back home – is good.

Edinburgh Highlights: Eating, Drinking

March 3, 2026 / fgrtommo / Leave a comment

Continuing the highlights of our month long stay in Edinburgh…… here the best of ways we found to sustain ourselves between our sightseeing.

Dinners

Restaurants in Edinburgh are worthy of a capital city; there is both high quality and diversity. The best are also very popular and we couldn’t get a suitable booking at a couple of the restaurants on our wish list. It seems from the evening restaurant experiences we did manage (in between more basic meals back at our rented accommodation) that the clientele is dominated by young professionals. It seems that either the cost-of-living crisis is a fiction for this group. Or perhaps they are spending their discretionary funds on the short-term pleasures of dining out rather than accumulating savings in the face of whatever jobs crisis Artificial Intelligence is promising to create for them.

Little Capo was my favourite evening dining experience. The food, especially the burrata, was excellent and our seating at the bar put us in the centre of a buzzing atmosphere. The service was excellent – friendly, attentive but not too quick.

A close second was a meal at Vinette. A tiny entrance led to a rather labyrinthine space where, again, the service was very good and at a very comfortable pace. Our table was somewhere between a corridor and a room and Jane had to spend the evening looking at a fridge of hanging beef which wasn’t ideal. However, the food was unusual (we didn’t choose the steaks) and very tasty.

Lunches

As we had when we visited Edinburgh for a month last year, we had lunch at The Port Of Leith Distillery. This held some nostalgia for us since, last year, coming to the bar in the distillery had been our first real outing together after Jane had broken her shoulder. It was interesting too to see the result of the demolition work we had a ring-side seat for last year. My lunch was excellent but Jane said hers was too tepid to be really enjoyable.

*^{View From Port of Leith Distillery: Last Year (Top) Versus This Year. Royal Yacht Britannia To The Right}*

Better for lunch and with an equally good view was Cafe Calton. This is on Calton Hill and is very popular with residents and tourists alike. We started with a shared, very tasty Scottish Rarebit and my chicken burger was very good with enough unusual touches to raise it above the ordinary. The efficient, smiling staff seemed to be having a good time and so did we.

I know I wanted to avoid a list but I have to mention Sunday lunches at Brown’s of Leith. This has only been open for a few months but it is already hugely popular. It was perfect for informal lunch with a large canteen style dining area with three or four pop-up type food and drink providers around the edge including seafood and pizza. We went twice and I will go again next time we are up.

Coffee and Wine

In my mind, Smith & Gertrude just trumped our old favourites from previous Edinburgh visits: Cairngorm, Toast and Spry Wine Bar and Ante Coffee. I thought that Ante had the best coffee but they gave it to me in a cup with no handle so I couldn’t drink it easily while it was as hot as I like without burning my fingers; style over function in my view.

Smith and Gertrude with its turntable playing classic vinyl, lovely cheese and wine selection. On one day, we dived in there as it opened at 4pm to have a swift glass of wine before picking up FG from nursery. The frisson of mischievousness on our part from being 10 minutes later than usual in picking him up was memorable.

Pubs

One of our longer walks took us through the residential area of Trinity which is full of 18^th and 19^th century villas and solidly built terraced houses. Just beyond, was the Firth of Forth and The Starbank Inn which provided a view of the sea and good food and beer.

The Firth of Forth Outside The Starbank Inn. Gloomy Day But Nice To See The Sea! — *^{The Firth of Forth Outside The Starbank Inn. Rather A Gloomy Day But Nice To See The Sea!}*

Although it was just over the road from where we were staying, we only managed to get into Teuchters Bar & Bunker, the scene of my rather unfortunate seating failure during last year’s visit, once.

Because Teuchters majors on the rugby I called upon the outstanding knowledge of Eldest Son’s parents-in-law for suggestions for a venue to watch an Arsenal football game with Youngest Son (he’s a big Arsenal fan) on a rainy Sunday night. They came up with Platform 5 which turned out to be perfect; a sports bar with a telly showing the Arsenal game in a sea of screens showing the (Glasgow) Rangers versus (Edinburgh) Hearts game in front of dozens of energised Scottish football fans. The atmosphere was great, the cheering was raucous, broken glass was on the floor, the bar staff were working flat out and Arsenal won (but Hearts lost); great evening!

As usual, Edinburgh had much to offer. There is still a lot that we have left to do there – I’ve still not been to a music concert there for example. We love it.

*^{Sunset Over Edinburgh And The End Of Our Stay}*

Edinburgh Highlights: Viewing

March 1, 2026 / fgrtommo / Leave a comment

We achieved so much in our month in Edinburgh and there seemed to be something memorable every day. The weather was grey and drizzly for most of the first three weeks, we both caught colds (the only apparent downside of visiting grandchildren) and I had a nasty recurrence of tinnitus for a few days. But my joints behaved, we had a nice place to stay and had a great time.

Listing all that we did will turn into a long list so, below, I’ll focus on the best and most pleasurable….. Sights seen first and then eating and drinking….

Art Galleries

As usual, we visited several private and public art galleries. Best for me were the several different exhibitions that came and went while during our month-long stay at the Scottish National Gallery. As last year, perhaps the best of these were the two substantial exhibitions of the best works by members of the Royal Scottish Academy. The first was for work of all types and the second focused on watercolours.

Various Works At The Royal Academy Show, Scottish National Gallery — *^{Various Works At The Royal Academy Show, Scottish National}*

*^{Huge Variety Of Watercolours from Royal Academicians At The Scottish National Galley Show}*

Alongside these there were two other exhibitions in the National Gallery. One celebrated the 200^th year of the Academy and was called Origin Stories. It showed works throughout the last two centuries and illustrated how members of the Academy (‘academicians’) supported, taught, mentored and inspired each other through a network of artistic relationships. The second was a small exhibition of Modern Miniatures – both small sculptures and paintings. All of this was very good to see.

'Modern Miniatures' At The Scottish National Gallery — *^{‘Modern Miniatures’ At The Scottish National Gallery}*

Elsewhere the Modern One was showing its rehanging of its permanent collection. Also, the City Art Centre was as excellent as usual with an exhibition of Scottish Portraiture alongside its permanent collection.

Works Qt Modern One Including One From A New Peter Doig Exhibition (Top Left) — *^{Recently Re-hung Works At Modern One And One From A New Peter Doig Exhibition (Top Left)}*

*^{Pictures At The City Arts Gallery (Including By Joan Eardley and John Bellany)}*

……And I always love visiting the National Portrait Gallery where the great entrance hall is so impressive.

*^{Entrance Hall Of The Scottish National Portrait Gallery}*

Here, this visit, there was a fascinating exhibition of photographic art by Alfred Buckham (‘Daredevil Photographer’) who, in the first half of the 20^th century, created aerial pictures from three negatives – one of a plane, one (or sometimes more) of clouds and one of a city or landscape taken from his own plane. He travelled the world as a somewhat larger-than-life Englishman, clearly had a great sense of humour, and produced some remarkable images.

Edinburgh BY Alfred Buckham — *^{Edinburgh By Alfred Buckham}*

Other Exhibitions

Dovecot Studios was also well worth visiting as we usually do. First, we saw an exhibition along the viewing balcony of tapestries made at the studios. I thought some of these were very good to look at and almost all were impressive in some way.

*^{The Dovecot Studio And Some Of The Tapestries On The Balcony}*

Downstairs we saw a new exhibition: The Biba Story: 1964–1975. Biba fashion rather passed me by at the time. Regardless, the exhibition was well laid out and interesting.

*^{The Biba Exhibition At Dovecot Studios}*

The exhibits conveyed the distinctive Biba style, the development of the brand was fascinating, and the stores that sold the goods were clearly impressive. At the end, my questions about textile sourcing and what the accessories looked like were largely answered but I was left unclear about why the whole enterprise came to an abrupt end.

On a different scale, we saw a small exhibition of textiles and weaving by Lynda Graham at Mote102 Jane keeps an eye on this tiny gallery and we have visited before. It’s a intimate space with undecorated, rough walls that is perfect for the types of exhibitions Mote102 present. Indeed, the walls are almost as interesting as the art.

Films

The Everyman Cinema is a luxury with big sofas and the option to buy drinks and food from them. We saw and, overall, enjoyed Marty Supreme. Timothy Chalamet was very good but, as Jane said afterwards, the film has so much action that it felt like being hit around the head with a rolled-up newspaper for two and a half hours.

We also saw and enjoyed Hamnet. I especially enjoyed the last 20 minutes of Hamnet and can understand why Jessie Buckley has won so many awards for her performance.

I also went with Eldest Son to see the very different 28 Years Later: The Bone Temple at the Everyman Cinema. It was impressive throughout; the music and acting are top notch (especially Ralph Fiennes). This was my best cinematic experience overall while in Edinburgh; especially so since Eldest Son, who is a huge fan of the whole 28 series, had kindly shown me the prequel on his laptop/telly the previous day so that I was up to date.

Day Trips

We only left Edinburgh/Leith twice once to visit Stirling and the other time to visit Rosslyn Chapel.

There was a limited amount to see in Stirling but the train ride there was smooth and Stirling Castle is very impressively located, presented and preserved. It was made ornate and grand by James V as a way of underlining his status (some might say narcissism). The statues and rooms remain majestic.

*^{Inner Royal Chambers And The Chapel (Bottom Right), Stirling Castle}*

Our visit benefitted from gorgeous sunny weather and the views from the hill top on which it was built were of snowy mountains and wide river valleys. The history of the castle, its architecture and rooms were all well explained and maybe we will revisit it one day with a grandchild or two in tow since the presentations were very child-friendly. My lasting memories though, will be of the 360-degree panoramas available from the castle site and the neighbouring cemetery.

Our visit to Rosslyn Chapel did not benefit from sunny weather but it was an unexpectedly impressive building and, again, its history, architecture and specific features were well explained.

It seems that Victorian renovation efforts, following a long period of disrepair after the Reformation and attacks by Thomas Cromwell in 1650, were rather ill conceived. Severe problems with damp remain. However, and despite the building only being about half of what was originally intended by the owning St Clair family, it is a gothic marvel. The carving throughout the chapel is remarkable and the stories surrounding it – including those amplified by Dan Brown in his famous book ‘The Da Vinci Code’ – are absorbing.

Again, I can imagine revisiting the Chapel in the future with grandchildren but on a drier, sunnier day so that we can appreciate the views and walk through the adjoining woodland rather more.

Best Walk

The best walks were with First Grandchild (FG) between our rented mews house or FG’s nursery and his home. Sometimes he sang, sometimes he ran or skipped, and sometimes he showed us the sights of Edinburgh from his perspective. We particularly enjoyed him pointing out the absent parts of clothes dummies in the windows of fashion shops – some didn’t have feet, some lacked arms and all were missing their faces. FG is almost constantly amusing as he burns off energy and reveals his vivid imagination.

I walked along the Water of Leith and through the Royal Botanic Gardens many times and walking around of the Georgian architecture West End and New Town is endlessly satisfying.

*^{Barely Spring Views In The Royal Botanic Gardens, Edinburgh}*

However, my favourite walk without FG during our month in Edinburgh was along the Union Canal. This showed me once industrial parts of Edinburgh I’d not seen before and the Slateford Aqueduct over the Water of Leith was an unexpected and impressive sight. The Water of Leith Visitor Centre nearby wasn’t open but I’ll be back.

Indeed, I am already looking forward to our next visit to the sights of Edinburgh.

My Retirement Journey

I've Retired! What Next?