I Do Like A Plan!

December 18, 2025 / fgrtommo / 2 Comments

One of the things that occasionally frustrates Jane, my wife, is how I love to stick to routines. I’m not good with the unpredictable and the unexpected. Surprise visitors, sudden changes to imminent diary dates, unbidden moves of items from one storage location to another, furniture moves, unnecessary changes to mobile phone features; all tend to cause me more anxiety than they should, especially as they are trivial first-world problems and my wife loves them all.

I think that my craving for plans to achieve calm routines is why my career went best when I was in operational information technology. There, the reliability of day-to-day computer services is critical. Having computer services working smoothly day after day was a key aim – not least because running computer services is cheaper that way. Changes had to be managed very carefully and if an anomaly happened then all efforts were made to ensure they didn’t happen again. Plans and routine were lovely then and I still hanker for them.

Fortunately, especially since my retirement, my wife jolts me out of this way of being so I am forced to stay on my toes. She will be the one to suggest that we go to a different pub for our usual Sunday pint and crossword. She will change the drawer contents around in the kitchen so I can’t find anything for a few days. She will poke me into holidays and outings. I think I am better at embracing, and even instigating, change than before – for example, my cooking skills and bravery are vastly improved from a few years ago – but it is my wife who tends to really try new things.

Of course, external events also push me off my routine and disrupt our plans. COVID almost derailed our family Christmas in 2020 and it did ultimately erase our plans to walk the North Devon/Cornwall Coastal Path earlier that year. The weather has also intervened to prevent or near-ruin other holidays in the past.

*^{Opening The Bedroom Blinds To The Sort Of Winter Sunrise And Weather I Like!}*

Increasingly too, as I get older, I’m conscious that health issues can mess up the best laid plans and prevent implementation of my normal routines. For example, I hate it when an arthritic joint prevents me from walking comfortably into town to get the newspaper and daily shopping. Last month, the blow up of my ankle problem took me off my feet for a few days and this month, a bout of orbital cellulitis (an infection of the tissue around the eyes) did the same. Anyone would be annoyed at these unplanned health issues but I feel my anxiety about them is amplified somehow by my feeling of missing out on my usual pattern of life.

Those ‘outages’, as we called computer service failures in my working life, help me appreciate the days when I can just get on with the routine and think about plans relatively proactively and calmly. ‘Seize the day’ as Jane often tells me. I need to do that more.

The bones of our plans for Christmas and the New Year are pretty much in place and, while weather and health may, of course, disrupt them, I’m very happy with what is in store. We kick off with carols in a local church then dinner at ours with Jane’s siblings. Then Christmas Day will be with Second Grandchild (SG), his parents and his other grandparent. SG is a very happy little boy by nature and I can imagine he is going to be beside himself with Christmas cheer – while not yet fully understanding many of the related concepts.

Boxing Day will be just Jane and I – for the first time ever, I think, we will be on our own. I am hoping for a sunny, crisp, wintery day and a long walk to a local pub for a leisurely lunch.

*^{Winter Sunset At Ruskin Mill (Jane’s Photo)}*

Then we are off to Belfast to see Youngest Son and his wife. To round out the family tour, we are then in Edinburgh for four weeks during which another Scottish grandchild should arrive.

We were last in Edinburgh for First Grandchild’s (FG) fourth birthday. As usual, we had a great time as we mixed family socials with art and nature. Eldest Son and his wife always provide amazing hospitality and it was lovely to see how FG had developed since we last saw him in the summer. His sense of fun combined with his determination and focus on detail were brought out by some of the presents he got for his birthday. It is clear that he is going to love ‘LEGO®’!

The Water Of Leith - Very Full During Our November Visit to Edinburgh — *^{The Water Of Leith – Very Full During Our November Visit to Edinburgh}*

The arrival of FG’s new sibling in January is going to colour, enliven and warm our visit next year. We had hoped to repeat what we did early in 2025 (without, this time, Jane breaking her shoulder!) but the flat we had rented then and booked for this visit was unexpectedly withdrawn from Airbnb last week – a very irritating imposed change of plan!

We have rebooked elsewhere (inevitably at a higher cost….) and are looking forward to our time in Edinburgh enormously. We just need to complete the plans for our schedule of trips, restaurants and art intake for the time we are there. I do like a plan!

Reading Not Walking

November 12, 2025 / fgrtommo / Leave a comment

Since retiring, I have loved spending time walking around our local area. I have done so every day when we haven’t been away from home. Generally, I will walk into town in the morning for the newspaper and daily shopping. Then I will often venture out for another walk in the afternoon.

On Tuesdays I will usually walk into Stroud to work at the Food Bank and, if there is a mid-week home game at Forest Green Rovers Football Club, will also walk to and from that. Those days see me doing almost 30,000 steps. On average, I have managed (often quite hilly) 15,000 steps a day since retiring. That, alongside some gardening, constitutes my main exercise.

*^{Autumn Walk. Ledgemore Bottom, Horsley, Gloucestershire}*

We are lucky that a plethora of footpaths in the area provides a large variety of routes to take to the shops or to the football ground or just as extra excursions through local fields and woods. It is particularly fortunate that Ruskin Mill College allows pedestrian access through their landscaped grounds between our village and Nailsworth, the nearest town. Further variety is provided by the seasons and this walk is especially uplifting at the moment as the trees turn to autumnal brown, yellow and red.

*^{Ruskin Mill College Grounds. Pretty Even In Autumn Rain}*

But all this walking takes up time. It’s time well spent for me; I love the outdoors, being in nature and happening to bump into friends on the way. I’ve enjoyed walking so much that, until this week, I hadn’t really thought about this consumption of time and what else I could do with the few hours a day I have spent walking.

What triggered me thinking about this time was a big flare up of a problem I have had for several months – off and on – with one of my ankles. I was most of the way to my weekly stint at the Stroud Food Bank when my ankle seized up. I pressed on and the ankle eased up a bit but then got a lot more painful. I bumbled my way through the shift, got Jane to pick me up afterwards and then spent 10 hours moaning and groaning about the pain (I’m not good with pain…)

I spent the next few days avoiding much movement. There was no thought of any substantial walking while my ankle settled down and, suddenly, I had several more hours to fill. I started reading.

*^{Walking Going Of A Cliff Edge (And A Careful Recovery Since)}*

I got up to date with a hardcopy of The Economist which Middle Son gets for me (very generously) every week on the back of his digital subscription. For the first time I could remember, my digesting of the content got ahead of publication and I was willing the next edition to arrive early. I read The Guardian daily from front to back (I still prefer hard copy; old habits die hard). And then I picked up the excellent novel (Long Island by Colm Toibin) I have been reading very slowly for weeks and finished it in a couple of days.

I ordered two more books and have started one at a pace unheard of before my ankle forced me to sit on the sofa rather more. I’ve remembered how much I like a good book and, even if my ankle recovers fully, I’m going to walk a bit less and read a lot more. That feels like a particularly attractive option as winter approaches, the days get shorter and the weather becomes less inviting.

*^{Batsford Arboretum, North Cotswolds}*

Of course, in between the routine walking over the last few weeks and before the ankle blow-up, there have been other highlights. On one sunny day recently, we went out to Batsford Arboretum in the North Cotswolds. Not surprisingly given the time of year and the weather, the arboretum was popular and some areas were quite crowded. Nonetheless, it is wonderful at this time of year. The mature trees were full of beautiful autumn shades and there were surprisingly big vistas across Oxfordshire and Wiltshire.

Batsford House can be seen from the arboretum but is not open to the public. However, within the grounds of the main house is a pleasant church, a museum of old gardening implements and a busy garden centre. We visited each only briefly and left for worthy, organic, vegetarian lunch at Abbey Home Farm on the way home.

*Batsford Arboretum Garden Implements Museum*

Batsford Church — *Batsford Arboretum Garden Implements Museum*

Two other memorable but more local events during the last few weeks have been a Diwali celebration in our local church and a local concert. The Diwali celebration was a second excuse in recent months to get dressed up in the Indian clothing we bought for a wedding of a friend in India almost a decade ago. It was a joyful event with people of all ages learning and performing Gujarati stick dancing, good music, drink and food, and a lot of local chatter. It is wonderful that we have people in such a small community prepared to organise such involving events.

The gig we went to was by This Is The Kit who we have seen before. They were supported by a band called Small Plant. They were perfect for a slightly out-there venue like the Goods Shed in a rather bohemian town like Stroud. Their first two songs were about propagating seedlings and making sourdough bread. They were unusual but we were pleased when they gave way to This is The Kit.

This Is The Kit Headlining At The Goods Shed, Stroud — *Small Plant At The Goods Shed, Stroud*

I really love This is The Kit’s music and, despite the lead guitar being occasionally a little over-dominant, they were, again, very good to watch and hear. Kate Stables, who leads the band, is a very personable and extremely talented musician. I was humming the tunes for days afterwards. Now I’m spending more time on the sofa, I can listen to them at home a little more too.

Spring Blossoms

April 29, 2025 / fgrtommo / 2 Comments

In the weeks since we got back from our month in Edinburgh – a month we have already booked again in Edinburgh for 2026 – we have settled into a home-based routine. This has been especially pleasurable due to the exceptional Spring weather. It has been largely sunny, the mornings have been fresh and clear and, since the clocks went forward, the evenings have been long and getting longer. It has been a lovely time to be back at home in the country and to see the trees, bulbs and perennials start to come back to life and into flower.

*^{Cherry Tree In The Local Town of Nailsworth}*

The walks into the local town for the newspaper and daily provisions have been chilly on the way in but warm on the way back. The dry weather has opened up previously muddy routes across the fields. The paths have offered views in the local woodlands and hedgerows of, first, the last snowdrops, then daffodils, then bluebells and primroses, and, now, wild garlic and cow parsley.

The bursts of white from the blackthorn and, now, the hawthorn have been terrific while the early flowering cherry trees have now been supplanted in their splendour by later flowering cherry, apple, plum and pear tree blossom.

*^{Apple Blossom In The Neighbouring Field}*

In the midst of all of this we have had a late Easter celebration with our grandchildren and their parents. The weather was kind and made the construction of my Easter Egg Hunt for the grandchildren easy. First Grandchild in particular, really enjoyed it and we all enjoyed watching him gather up rather too many Easter eggs. FG and his parents live in a central Edinburgh flat and he really appreciates the contrast of English countryside. It was so rewarding to see his excitement on the Easter Egg Hunt and on other nature hunts and adventures we had organized.

FG also loved seeing and holding the brand-new baby goats owned by some village friends of ours. I was amazed at how gentle both the baby goat and FG were.

^{Easter: First Grandchild And A Brand New Kid}

Second Grandchild was too young to join in everything directly but he too seemed to capture the vibrant atmosphere of our Easter weekend. He always seems to be smiling. That was particularly the case at Easter with so many people around including, especially, his cousin.

The good recent weather has allowed me to catch up on clearing vegetable patches. There is more to do and I need to be careful not to aggravate joint aches and pains, but I am pleased with the progress I have made. Plus, the sunny evenings are starting to beckon us out for relaxed drinks amongst the euphorbia, Judas Tree and wisteria and, soon, the alliums and salvias.

Against this Spring backdrop, there have been a few other highlights. We made a rare trip to London for a wedding (of Jane’s God-daughter) and to see and stay with some old friends of ours. The finale of a decade-long set of ‘boy’s nights out’ with mates dating back to the 1970’s was arranged to coincide with our trip to London. Apart from the hangover, it was a splendid trip and very enjoyable, particularly as we got to see our friends’ newly renovated house. It was great that the final boy’s night out was a little extravagant with a private room, silly hats and a wonderful souvenir booklet produced by the prime organizer. This included pictures of long-ago evenings together that encapsulated fading but amusing memories.

Also, back in March, friends in the village took Jane and I on an excursion to Dyrham Park. We have long admired this couple for heading out on quickly arranged short breaks and excursions when the weather looks promising. This time they took us off with them for a very relaxed and interesting time together.

We didn’t venture into the Dyrham Park house which has been renovated comprehensively recently, but the gardens were lovely. The daffodils were in peak season and the beautiful pale limestone of the baroque hall provided a great backdrop to views of the planting. The parkland around the house offers splendid views of the south Gloucestershire and Avon landscape.

I hadn’t been to the park for several years, when I went with my parents well before my Mum died, but I’m keen to go again in Autumn. By that time nature will have moved on and the trees and gardens will look very different.

Two other highlights: first a very enjoyable visit to Tetbury Goods Shed to see a band we have seen a few times called Faeland. They were on good form with an extended lineup and the lead singer’s beautiful clear voice resonating around a well-designed venue.

Second, I finally pickled the crop of shallots that I harvested well over six months ago. They have been winking at me from the string bag I had stored them in every time I went into the shed. Two years ago, I set myself a New Year resolution to do something creative at least once a month; I have failed on that. But pickling well over a kilogram of stored shallots counts as being creative for April – even if I haven’t actually tasted them yet.

Not everything in March and April has gone smoothly. My knee and ankle are improving slowly with help from physiotherapy but both have been annoyingly painful at times. Plus, a couple of weeks ago, I had a ‘fall’ (when approaching 70 one seems to call them ‘falls’ rather than a ‘trip’ or a ‘slip’ which would have been a more accurate description of the event) which wrenched my shoulder. But, overall, it has been a very good early Spring and I have appreciated being retired and so able to fully appreciate it outdoors rather than from an office window.

A Different Way In Edinburgh

February 7, 2025 / fgrtommo / 3 Comments

We are booked for a month into a very comfortable, nicely warm and well-furnished Airbnb in central Edinburgh that has a view of the Castle. Our idea has been to try a model for visiting Edinburgh that is different from our usual 3-4 night stays with Eldest Son, wife and First Grandchild. In part it is just an extended holiday, but in part a test as to how we might find living more permanently in this wonderful city.

*^{Sunrise Over Edinburgh Castle From Our Airbnb}*

The first two weeks have been extremely successful – until a bit of a disaster yesterday; more on that later.

We have already visited lots of Edinburgh sights – the museums, cathedrals, galleries and exhibitions – got into the hinterlands of Edinburgh and, of course, done a bit of grandchild entertainment. Were lucky enough to have a double dose of grandchildren when Middle Son, his fiancée and Second Grandchild visited us on our second weekend. That visit, plus the nature of the intermittent contact with First Grandchild over a longer period than usual, has created a bit of a feel of living here rather than just holidaying here.

*^{Edinburgh From The Top Of The National Museum of Scotland}*

No doubt that feeling would have been further enhanced by Youngest Son and his wife being able to join us as planned on our first weekend in Edinburgh. Unfortunately, Storm Eowyn put paid to that. Their flight was cancelled and Edinburgh was all but shut down during the worst if the storm. Even at the end of the storm, the gusts of wind were strong enough to knock me off my feet!

Because of, first, Storm Eowyn, and then a visit from Middle Son and family, we have tended to eat in rather than out. However, we have sampled a couple of our favourite bars and a few cafés, and we love the local pub (Teuchters). Anyway, there are two more weeks for trying some more recommended restaurants.

*^{Another View of Edinburgh Castle From Flodden Wall}*

Cooking in a holiday home is not new to us but doing so most evenings over a few weeks is another way of generating a feeling of being ‘home from home’ rather than just being on holiday. Next week, we are even entertaining Eldest Son’s parents in law. That will be a further novelty but a nice reflection of how things might be if we moved to Edinburgh more permanently.

During our days here, we have been very active. We have, of course, sampled the normal delights of the Royal Botanic Garden the Scottish National Portrait Gallery, the Modern Art Gallery of Scotland the Scottish National Gallery and the National Museum of Scotland. Edinburgh is a capital and has public buildings, exhibitions and collections to match that status. There were new exhibitions in all of the galleries and all were a pleasure to visit – although it was sad to see the Storm Eowyn damage in the Botanic Gardens.

*^{Storm Damage – One Of The Largest Cedars In The Royal Botanic Gardens Has Gone}*

The Scottish National Gallery is celebrating 40 years of its photography collection and curation. Photography is not my favourite art form but it was good to see some pictures by some famous photographers (such as Robert Mapplethorpe, Annie Liebovitz, and Lee Miller) among the often gritty, local Scottish fare.

*^{40 Year Celebration Of Scottish Photography Collection – Including The Iconic Lennon/Ono Photo}*

The Modern Art Gallery continues to show the substantial Everlyn Nicodemus exhibition which I saw on our last Edinburgh visit. I sped through that but perhaps somehow enjoyed it a little more on a second viewing; plus, there are several other works in the gallery’s permanent collection I had not focused on before.

^{‘After the Birth’ By Everlyn Nicodemus}

The Scottish National Gallery had a sequel to an exhibition of JMW Turner watercolours that I had seen in the gallery two years previously. That had shown the section of the Henry Vaughan collection of Turner watercolours that had been bequeathed to Scotland. This new exhibition was of the selection of watercolours bequeathed to Northern Ireland that again, as part of conditions of the donation, can only be shown to the public in January.

*^{Turner Watercolours at the National Gallery of Scotland}*

There were no surprises in the collection of blurry seascapes, sunrises, sunsets and mountain valleys shrouded in mist. But I like Turner’s style and enjoyed the viewing despite the long queues to get in.

Also at the National Gallery was a small exhibition of art inspired by the landscape of the Orkneys, called ‘In Orcadia’ and including large, interestingly constructed paintings by Samantha Clark.

That was good but even better, I thought, was the large exhibition of paintings by the Royal Scottish Society of Painters in Watercolour. There were hundreds of paintings on show and of course, not all hit the spot for me. But overall, I thought the quality was very high and I could imagine several on my living room wall.

^{The Royal Scottish Society of Painters in Watercolour Annual Exhibition}

We also went to diverse art exhibitions at Dovecote Studios and the City Art Centre. At Dovecote we saw textiles and paintings by Ptolemy Mann. The designs were colourful and bold but Jane was a little disappointed that the majority of the textiles were manufactured in India not Scotland.

*^{Dovecote Studios And Ptolemy Mann Artwork}*

At the City Art Centre were two exhibitions of modern Scottish art and of pop art; I liked the pots by Lara Scobie at the former and the typically irreverent set of cartoonish watercolours by the seemingly slightly unhinged, David Shrigley.

^{Works By Lara Scobie and David Shrigley At The City Art Centre, Edinburgh}

We made a couple of trips to the National Museum of Scotland. The first to see some of the displays that we don’t get much of a chance to see when accompanied by First Grandchild. The second was with him; his increasingly calm inquisitiveness was a joy to participate in.

One concept we discussed, as we passed some of the dinosaur and wild animal exhibits, was that of skeletons. Subsequent conversations indicate that he understood how creatures often have skeletons and that you can’t see until after they are dead. It’s fascinating to watch children learn.

*^{Everything From Dinosaurs To Hi-Tech On Show At The National Museum of Scotland}*

And now we come to the misfortune of yesterday….. Apart from Storm Eowyn, the weather during our stay has been largely dry and sunny. However, it has also been cold and yesterday morning my wife, Jane, slipped on some ice and, it turned out, broke her shoulder. The pictures of x-rays that we came away from the hospital with have helped First Grandchild understand the importance of bones but there is no other upside to the accident.

We’ll cope and enjoy the rest of our stay in Edinburgh but plans regarding how are changing……

Heading Into 2025

January 13, 2025 / fgrtommo / Leave a comment

My memories of Christmas are beginning to dissolve into a blur of having felt very good about the convivial familial get together. It was great to have our close family in our house – the only exception being Youngest Son’s wife who had to dog-sit in Belfast. It was, once again, amusing and interesting to see the two grandchildren in close proximity and to compare and contrast their current, very different characters. Jane ran the kitchen with help from all and we ate and drank well. But now we head into 2025 with the promise of new challenges and entertainments.

The cold snap has brough some frosty and icy conditions underfoot but some beautiful clear air and skies. My physiotherapist has advised me to continue walking despite my uncomfortable knee and so I have limped around to keep it mobile. I think that continued walking, and the daily exercises I’ve been given, are helping my knee although they have also strained other parts of my hips and legs so health sometimes feels like a running battle.

I’ve been thinking about New Year resolutions as I always do at this time of year (but, usually, not so much thereafter). I will maintain my ongoing targets for drink free days, limiting alcohol unit intake, weight and walking steps. However, I also want to be more proactive generally about the various health niggles that I suppose are inevitable at this time of life.

*^{More Cold Walking On The Way To Town}*

I’m also keen to do better on a resolution I made this time last year: to be more creative and do more creative things. I made some progress early last year with visible sock darning, devising and running a darts competition in the local pub, and creating a few treasure hunts for First Grandchild. But my creativity petered out and, for example, the Kintsugi kit remains untouched and making sourdough bread is on hold. I must do better.

I also need to read more books and not just newspapers and magazines given that I enjoy fiction so much. I have resolved to read more during the day since, currently, I never manage more than a few pages each night in bed just before nodding off. Currently a 500-page book takes me almost 6 months to get through even when it’s a good read (as I think Demon Copperhead by Barbara Kingsolver is).

My ability to find that daytime reading space is related to a resolution to nap less after lunch. I love our very comfortable sofa adjacent to the kitchen with its view out into the garden and nearby copse so I just have to avoid sitting on it after lunch!

Our local Talk Club for men sharing how they feel and what they are going to do about improving their mental health, has restarted after a 6-month hiatus. At the first meeting of the year, held in a new location above the village pub, I realised once again that my only real anxieties at the moment are rooted in health – which I need to take a bit more control of where I can – and world events. So, another resolution is to reduce use of social media (I have already left the increasingly toxic ‘X’) and continue last year’s resolution and listen to the news on the radio even less. I’m not sure if that will help but Talk Club is a good mechanism to ensure that I think about how world news affects my well-being and if increased abstention from hearing about it makes any difference.

The year has, apart from the ongoing health irritants, started well. Following the family-oriented period over Christmas, I have resumed visits to the village pub and contacts with friends and acquaintances in the village. It is clear from talking to them that I, and Jane, have been fortunate to avoid flu so far this winter.

*^{Promising Sunrise Viewed From Our House}*

Also, Jane has gone off for a week-long sewing retreat at Merchant & Mills, her favourite sewing pattern manufacturer and textile sales room in Rye. That has been a nice change for us both; she has enjoyed the retreat and learnt some new sewing skills while I have fended for myself successfully and have got to watch some streamed series in the television that Jane has no interest in (Series 3 of Industry on BBC iPlayer is, again, remarkable).

Next, we have an innovative trip to Edinburgh – innovative in the sense that it is a month-long stay rather than just a long weekend. We are both excited about how it will feel to be on holiday for so long (with the logistics helped a little by the likelihood of a bit of house sitting by some family members while we are away). We are looking forward to seeing the Edinburgh branch of the family in a different context and over a longer period than usual and to getting to know Edinburgh even better. The icing on the mid-winter break cake is that we are accommodating the Bristol and Belfast branches of the family on a couple of weekends while we are there. It’s a stimulating start to 2025.

A Stag In Active August

August 26, 2024 / fgrtommo / 2 Comments

Retirement in August has felt busy so far. There have been several separate events to enjoy. In between these, I have been walking while listening to political podcasts, tidying our field and garden, visiting the local recycling tip with multiple dumpy bags of green (mainly thistle, bramble and bindweed) waste, and enjoying our local community hub: the village pub.

I visited my Dad and sister in Nottingham for the first time since the end of his innovative and apparently very successful cancer treatment. I’m really proud of him; he has stuck with all the hospital visits, the injections and the infusions and they have not only benefitted him, but furthered cancer research. It was great to catch up with them and, for a change, win at our games of Mahjong.

*^{Dad Ringing The Hospital ‘Ward Bell’ To Celebrate His End Of Treatment}*

The football season has restarted and, during my brief stay in Nottingham, I managed to get to Boston in Lincolnshire to see my dear Forest Green Rovers treat me to a rare, stonking win. After two successive, distressing relegations, we seem to have found our natural level again.

*^{Boston Football Club: Nickname The Pilgrims Because So Many Original Pilgrim Fathers Migrated To The Americas From Boston}*

Whilst in Boston I had time to climb the church tower and take in some aerial views of Boston and the very flat surrounding landscape. The church is large and the tower is impressive. The port and its surrounding sluice gate system was also substantial but is now looking run down. Indeed, much of the town looked as though it needs a face lift.

*^{Views Across Boston, The Port And The Church}*

*^{An Attractive Part Of Boston Next to The River Witham With The Tide In}*

Also in August, Jane and I have visited Bath, dropped in on Second Grandchild in Bristol, hosted Youngest Son (YS) as he has worked his way through his busy month of multiple stag dos, weddings and video shoots, and attended a talk on artistic gardening in Stroud.

Amid all this activity the most unusual event for me was the opportunity to attend part of YS’s own Stag Weekend. That was a lot of fun – even though I opted out of the most boisterous activities and those requiring the heaviest drinking penalties. It was lovely to be invited and great to catch up with old friends and meet a few of YS’s best mates who I didn’t already know.

Middle Son kindly gave up his bed to allow me a relatively comfortable, though rather hungover, sleep in a large tent also shared by Oldest Son; it was my first experience of something resembling camping since YS was at Primary School and a lot more restful than then!

The main purpose of a visit to Bath was to equip YS and myself with light suits for YS’s wedding and for the wedding of one of Jane’s nieces in Italy next month. With that aspect of the trip satisfactorily achieved, I visited The Holburne Museum to see a Henry Moore exhibition.

This was a small exhibition of Henry Moore’s small works. Many of his familiar themes such as mother and child, helmets, family groups, reclining figures in stone, wood and metal were covered in a single room. The breadth was admirable but it took a while to get used to the delicacy of the work having been used to the more massive Henry Moore sculptures I have seen in the past. In truth, only a few of the displays in this exhibition really stood out for me but a couple were lovely and it was worth the visit.

On the way out I popped into a separate exhibition in the Museum by Mr Doodle (aka Sam Cox). He is clearly into fun art and the room completely covered in his ‘doodles’ (see below) certainly raised a smile.

Closer to home we went to a talk on ‘Where Gardening Meets Art’ at the Museum in the Park in Stroud. The Museum has a lovely terraced and walled garden that I hadn’t visited since shortly after it was built and planted several years ago. The sun was shining and the garden looked splendid.

*^{The Walled Garden At Museum In The Park, Stroud}*

The talk itself was preceded by an exhibition of gardening and plant inspired artworks by Cleo Mussi, who’s work we know well, and Fiona Haser Bizony, founder of Electric Daisy Flower Farm. I liked several of Cleo’s mosaics, especially the simpler ones, but we quickly moved outside to the garden in evening sun and a small bar offering locally brewed beer.

*^{Cleo Mussi’s Hands Mosaics At Museum In The Park, Stroud}*

Jane had booked the evening and I didn’t know what to expect from the talk. In the event, it was efficiently introduced and a thoroughly entertaining. The main speaker was Charlotte Molesworth who has a renowned garden in Benendon, Kent. She was terrific. She had a lot of good sense to share and did it very amusingly. Her anecdotes were warm and lovely and she had a great answer to every question. The whole evening exceeded my expectations severalfold.

*^{Charlotte Molesworth Speaking About Where Gardening Meets Art}*

August – and, unfortunately, summer – is now drawing to a close. The final week will be punctuated by further visits to The Hog, our local pub, for its Summer Bank Holiday Hogfest (a beer, music and food festival) and then the monthly quiz. I am also looking forward hugely to Forest Green Rovers’ first home game of the season on the club’s brand-new, hybrid (5% plastic) pitch.

But then my thoughts will turn to our family holiday in Italy prior to Jane’s niece’s wedding in Rome. I can’t wait to see the two grandchildren together amongst our sons and their partners. It is going to be a real treat to have everyone together.

Resolutions, Resolutions

January 3, 2024 / fgrtommo / 1 Comment

Jane and I celebrated New Year Eve in our local pub but, I’m afraid to say, were in bed by 10.30pm. Despite not lasting out the end of year festivities, the turn of the year does always seem to me to be a highlight and a chance to think afresh about the world, and our actions within it. What better time is there to check on past personal resolutions, set some new ones and think as hopefully as possible about what lies ahead.

My New Year resolutions have largely been the same from year to year and have revolved primarily around walking more, drinking less alcohol and managing my weight. I’ve done ok in hitting targets in these areas and am not inclined to tighten the targets here. I walk enough, my weight is stable and I enjoy drinking beer, wine and whiskey too much to reduce my intake to, for example, the “UK Chief Medical Officers (CMOs) low risk drinking guidelines, based on up-to-date scientific evidence”. I may regret that one day, but not yet.

_{Beyond My Normal Walking Routes – An Old Cemetery in Woodchester, Near Stroud}

Another of the New Year’s resolutions last year was to do more day tripping with Jane. The idea was to capitalise on the flexibility of my retirement and her limited working hours to decide at short notice, when the weather forecast was positive, to go on a short excursion. We did manage that a few times – a big success, for example, was our day trip very early in 2023 to Clevedon. But our joint resolve petered out so this New Year we have renewed it.

*^{The Severn Estuary – A Totally Different Landscape To That We Are Used To}*

Once again, we have started well. Already we have made it to Frampton on Severn, embarked on a walk along part of the Severn Estuary in squally weather, and dropped into The Bell at Frampton on Severn for a drink in a previously unvisited (by me at least) pub. Now we have to keep that up and I’m definitely counting our trip to Edinburgh this weekend in the tally.

*^{The Gloucester And Sharpness Canal, Frampton On Severn}*

As targeted, I did manage to read one more book in 2023 than the paltry total I managed in 2022. I want to read more novels and will especially focus on easy-reading crime and historical thrillers. It is unfortunate for my resolution target that the book I have just started is a sprawling 560 page novel (by Philippa Gregory) with a tiny typeface. However, it is exactly the sort of historical novel I tend to enjoy so I hope to up my reading pace.

I have added a few more New Year Resolutions to the usual set. One is to watch, and listen to, less ‘news’. Its depressing, I tend to talk over it with my views and critique, and listening to it at breakfast, at lunch, before dinner and then again before bed is repetitive and needless: stop!

I really need to get out in the garden more. There is always so much to do and the build-up of gardening tasks is one of the things that causes me anxiety while, once I get out there, gardening is one of the things that really relaxes me. It is also good exercise despite being challenging to my back. To compensate, I have added a resolution to stop talking about doing my routine back exercises and just do them.

There are a couple of others that will be harder to track. I want to do something a bit more creative but need to think harder about what sorts of things that might entail (watch this space – maybe….). Finally, I want to do a better job of satisfying my wife Jane’s frequent desire to have a coffee in town on the days we walk in together. Being stuck in my ways, I always prefer the very hot, strong coffee we make at home but I know Jane likes the sense of occasion having a cup in a café for a change.

In the interests of transparency, here is the full set of resolutions with 2023 performance against those carried forward. The key will be to stay healthy so their achievement is possible and hope the world doesn’t go to hell in a handbasket in the meantime.

Dunkeld: Dreich But Alluring

November 30, 2022 / fgrtommo / Leave a comment

After celebrating First Grandchild’s (FG’s) first birthday in Edinburgh, we headed north to Dunkeld, ‘The Gateway to the Highlands’, on the southern edge of the Scottish Highlands and on the River Tay.

*^{The Tay at Dunkeld (From The Bridge)}*

We arrived in time to take stock of the village and to stroll past the partly ruined Dunkeld Cathedral (now serving as a Parish Church) to a riverside walk along the Tay.

We learnt a little of the history of the village – it was almost completely destroyed in 1689 during and after the battle of Dunkeld between the forces of William of Orange and the Jacobites supporting James VII of Scotland (who lost this one) – and started to plan the following full day in it.

*^{Old Entrance To Dunkeld House (Which Was Where The Grass Behind Now Is)}*

As twilight drew in, we retreated to the bar of The Taybank hotel where we were staying. Our room was tasteful and very comfortable but notably low-tech (no TV). The bar wasn’t as cosy as it looked but dinner in the restaurant was outstanding. We retired to bed very satisfied with the previous few days of wedding and birthday celebrations and the comfort of our new surroundings.

Tastefulness At The Taybank Hotel

All that rather fell apart next morning. LSW was ill having clearly picked up whatever bug had been bothering FG the previous weekend. With the rain tipping down outside I stayed in the room offering a few words of sympathy – probably not enough – and devouring both of our breakfasts that had been delivered to our door. Those breakfasts were, like the dinner the previous evening, excellent.

With no sign of LSW’s recovery, I set about finding a local electric car charging point and getting us up to full battery capacity again. The only charger in the village was in use with no sign of the driver. While waiting, I sloshed through the rain down to the Tay. I must have looked a sad sight with my umbrella substituting for a lack of properly waterproof clothing and I’m sure the few locals I met giggled under their breath about daft English tourists. However, I was strangely content in what felt like a truly Scottish landscape in dripping, autumnal Scottish weather. I then read my newspaper in its entirety in our drenched and steamed up car for a while before, and then after, finally getting use of the charge point. Job done (eventually)!

LSWs lunch was Paracetamol and by the evening I was thinking that I might need some too for an increasingly persistent headache and back pain. It turned out later that many attendees at the previous weekend’s wedding had fallen down with a variety of illness symptoms. Stomach upset, sickness, headaches and back pain in a variety of combinations were tell-tale signs that we had got too close to FG. As my symptoms passed I felt even sorrier for FG who had probably had all the symptoms but had not understood why and had been unable to do much about it.

I managed another wet stroll through the gloaming both around the village and a little further along the Tay. I was astonished by the speed of the river and impressed by the moodiness of the light and the woodland alongside the river. The area is famous for the age and size of a number of its trees including larch, pines and beech and the history of many is set out informatively and proudly. I am looking forward to visiting again in better weather (when we are both in good health) so we can sample more of the numerous local walks and take in more of the alluring but vaguely melancholy atmosphere.

On our last morning in Dunkeld I again hoovered up both breakfasts. LSW couldn’t eat a thing but, by now, was well enough to venture out to sample several of the local, independent shops. Lon Store was particularly good. Then we then set off in the almost relentless rain for Dundee to see another part of a very wet Scotland.

In Praise Of A Clear Head

August 24, 2022 / fgrtommo / Leave a comment

I have been monitoring the number of my alcohol-free days since 2005. Over a decade ago I was drinking alcohol almost every day, and often drinking a beer alone in my flat after work in London. Now I have a target of 50% drink-free days each month and I have achieved that for the last three years.

When I retired 5 years ago, I realised that although I was starting to achieve the target number of drink-free days, I was way off the target for units of alcohol recommended by doctors. To galvanise myself for change, I set a monthly target for alcohol units consumed too. That target is 100 units of alcohol per month. That is still almost twice the recommended level but 50% less than where I was in my first two years of retirement.

I have achieved this personal target for the last two years but it’s been a struggle, especially this year (for reasons I’m yet to quite fathom). On days when I drink, I find that I average 6-7 units; that’s two thirds of a bottle of wine or three pints of beer (not, I think, an unreasonable amount of pleasure to have on a sunny evening in the garden, at a celebration, or in the pub garden on a lazy Sunday). But multiply that by 14-15 days and I’m closer to the 100 unit target than I would like.

*^{Alcohol Units/Month Consumption Since 2019 (I’m More Consistent Now But Consistently Only Just Below Target (100 Units)!}*

I have been helped in recent years by the advent of decent no, or low, alcohol beer; I like those from BrewDog especially. But now I have a new helper: ‘Clear Head’, a low alcohol beer served on tap at our village pub. It’s quite a refreshing, hoppy and nice tasting pint. Its recent availability on draft means that I can visit the pub more often and feel as though I’m having a proper pub drink (not the soft sugary stuff that I generally avoid, or mineral water that I can get out of the tap at home), while keeping my alcohol unit consumption down.

*^{One of the Best Low-Alcohol Beers I’ve Had}*

The net effect has been that Long-Suffering Wife (LSW) and I have visited the local pub more often during this summer, especially during the recent heat waves, but I have still stayed within my alcohol unit target. That’s good because the pub is so central to the community and our visits create opportunities for us to have impromptu meetings with other villagers and we just enjoy hanging out in the relaxed atmosphere there. The only downside is that LSW is probably drinking a bit more alcohol because she usually goes for a can of the relatively strong craft beer rather than the low alcohol variety, but then she drinks slowly and so is well below the recommended unit levels.

Another bonus is that 5% of Bristol Beer Factory’s revenue on sales of Clear Head go to Talk Club which is the valuable charity organisation that helps establish and organise Men’s Mental Fitness chat groups such as that I have been attending in recent weeks in our village. The sessions that I mentioned in my last post have continued to be fulfilling and have had the side effect of making me feel even more a part of the community. The pub landlord, who helps run the sessions, even gives participants a pint of ‘Clear Head’ to accompany us through the meetings; really nice!

*^{On Draft At Our Local Pub But It Comes In Cans Too}*

So, the heat waves are over for another year it seems. The cost of living crisis seems to be drowning out concerns about the climate and related biodiversity crises. However, the recent weeks of intense heat have underlined the need for us all to think about reducing our carbon footprint and adapting to the new climate that is inevitably going to envelop us.

*^{Local Lake Dried Up In The Recent Heat And The Same Lake Two Years Ago (With Cow)}*

LSW has planted most of our flower beds and terraces with relatively drought resistant plants so the garden has looked great throughout the summer with just minimal watering. However, during the greatest heat, we had to have the blinds down all day in our kitchen/diner extension with all its glass. Rather than be able to look out over the garden from the extension, we spent much of the heat wave sheltered in the cool of the old part of the house.

*^{Dry Garden And Sun Through Meadow Grass}*

We are thinking about ways to further adapt to persistent high temperatures in the future at the same time as trying to work out how we can isolate rooms we want to heat in winter so that we reduce overall energy demand and so save money in the face of escalating electricity and gas bills. We won’t be alone in that.

Later this week we are off north to Edinburgh to see First Grandchild and his parents again. The relative cool of Edinburgh may look an increasingly attractive medium/long term location as the south of the UK feels the impact of our changing summers. Short term, though, I’m sticking to home in our village and an occasional pint or two of ‘Clear Head’ on draft.

Mental Fitness

July 21, 2022 / fgrtommo / 3 Comments

As I move into my fifth year of retirement I’m maintaining a pretty stable routine but also trying a couple of new things.

One new thing is signing up to an informal Mens’ Mental Fitness ‘Club’. This is under the umbrella of a charity called Talk Club. The roughly weekly sessions are arranged by the local pub landlord and a couple of his fellow facilitators. They are held in his pub on a day when it is closed and no alcohol is available. I’ve attended three sessions so far and it’s been an interesting, new experience.

Long-Suffering Wife (LSW) would say I’m a pessimist and she is often frustrated by my negativity. But fundamentally, I’m happy and recognise my luck in life. I wouldn’t consider that I have many mental issues yet (I just have political and environmental worries). However, the sessions force each participant to consider their feelings in ways that many men, and certainly me, rarely do.

How do I feel out of 10? Why is that? What am I thankful for? What am I going to do this week to improve the way I feel? Just about the only time I have historically thought about these things is when I am writing posts for this blog. Now I have another reason and outlet.

The mental fitness sessions require answering all these questions and listening to other participants as they relate their feelings about them. It’s such a simple, but different process from anything else I have done that it is surprising and freeing. It certainly feels invigorating – both the relating of one’s own thoughts and the feeling that you are helping others by listening as they relay theirs.

I’m going to keep up my participation whenever I can and am grateful that I live in a village with so cool a pub that it is trying the Talk Club sessions out. I may be more listening than talking at the moment but who knows when challenging issues might arise and that might change.

*^{Horsley Village Church (With Flag). I Love This Village}*

The other main innovation in the last few weeks has been that I have investigated helping out in the local District’s Foodbank (Stroud District Foodbank). I went along to an open event at the local warehouse to see the operation and meet the organisers. It is impressive, expanding and much (and increasingly) needed.

The whole tour of the facility was very interesting. Clients are starting to avoid deliveries of vegetables like potatoes because they can’t afford to cook them so the Foodbank are providing slo-cookers (remember those from the 80s!) because they are energy efficient. The paper bags the food deliveries arrive in are reusable but have detachable name tags so that clients that do reuse them don’t suffer any stigma from using the Foodbank. The Foodbank management have experience and know what they are doing.

My introduction to the Stroud Foodbank satellite ‘drop off centre’ is next week. I don’t know how much I can help but I will try to and then see how things go.

Involvement at the Foodbank may mean dialling back a bit on my local Climate Change Network efforts; I hope not since this week’s record temperatures underline the need to keep awareness of the Climate and Biodiversity Emergencies at centre stage. However, as I described in my last, Retirement: Five Years On post, my days seem strangely full already. Also, the football season is about to start and there are visits to our sons in Belfast, Edinburgh and (hopefully, soon) Bristol to fit in. Not to mention the squeezing in of Mens’ Mental Fitness evenings!

Meanwhile, Long-Suffering Wife (LSW) and I made another trip to Edinburgh last weekend to see First Grandchild (FG) and his tired but loving parents. We had a lovely time as usual. Eldest Son’s (ES’s) fiancée is a great cook, we always feel very welcome, and we had another chance to meet ES’s future parents-in-law which is always fun. Plus, of course, we saw FG again and were able to assess and enjoy his excitingly rapid development.

It is, of course, a slog to drive to and from Edinburgh – about 9 hours including the charge-up of our electric car. But what a treat the weekend was! We visited North Berwick to the east of Edinburgh where we tried out the well-tested seaside entertainments of fish and chips on the quayside and a walk along the beach. FG had his first fish and chip lunch – the first of many I’m sure – and the fish I had from the Lobster Shack was exceptionally good.

*^{Views Of North Berwick, East Lothian, Scotland}*

I revisited the excellent Barbara Hepworth exhibition at the Scottish National Gallery of Modern Art, this time with LSW. I again found it was an impressive chronological account of some of her best work. I’m not yet sure what exhibition will replace this or the Joan Eardley exhibition in the sister Modern Art Gallery over the road, but I’m expecting great things for our next or next but one Edinburgh visit.

*^{The Hands, Barbara Hepworth, 1948 (Painted As Part Of A Series Following The Illness Of One OF Her Children)}*

Perhaps the highlight of the trip was when LSW and I were entrusted to take FG out for a trip to the Botanical Gardens. We have done this before but, in the past, FG has napped throughout. This time he was wide awake and expecting some entertainment and there was some concern that he would miss his Mum (something called ‘separation anxiety’ apparently). We delivered FG’s entertainment by showing him waterfalls and rapids in the Rockery Garden and then by sitting near a crowd of Japanese children who were playing around a large picnic. FG evidently loves the idea of running water and the proximity of noisy kids; he was a delight.

We are already planning our next trip to Edinburgh and will also try to squeeze in a summer trip to Belfast. We also have another short trip to London in a couple of weeks, reprising an even shorter one a couple of weeks ago to attend a highly convivial family birthday party. It is those trips that help to sustain my mental fitness. I look forward to being able to weave that into my reasoning for my ‘feelings score’ at my next Talk Club Mens’ Mental Fitness group session.

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